Answers for November 2007

Ah, at last a whole quiz about the Titanic! Imagine my joy …. I wish I had thought of the kiddies’ bouncy castle that one respondent pointed out. WINNER this month is another long-term hanger on, it’s been a while but welcome to the three-times-winner club:

Robert McMartin

of Melbourne Airport. There was that bloke who lived at Orly Airport for 15 years … but surely Melbourne Airport would be a logical place to live, I mean how could anyone fly from Melbourne? My idea of the perfect holiday is: go to Melbourne Airport, then give up the idea of flying anywhere at all and spend the holiday in Melbourne, then when the holiday is over, well it never ends ….


Question 1

For the 700 third-class passengers on the Titanic, how many baths were provided?

Answer

Two – but later, 700  🙂

Additional Answers

  • As the third class passengers were mainly Irish, or British, I would bet that one bath was one bath too many. Ahh, England land of the great soap dodger.
  • 0
  • 1 giant one, filled entirely with salt water
  • 1/700 each. This was 0.0014285714285714285714285714285714 more than was needed given the hygiene standards of the time.
  • 4
  • 50
  • 700
  • All of ’em – it was a big one called the Alantic
  • Baths? Baths? Those things are so unhygienic! But the Titanic was nothing if not egalitarian; there were two baths in steerage, one for men and one for women. Ultimately it was deemed to be far more efficient just to dunk the hoi polloi in the sea en masse, although the logistics of the Operation Great Unwashed went somewhat pear-shaped after the initial immersion phase.
  • Just as at one time it was a common belief that the world was round, back in the early 1900’s it was believed that daily bathing was unhealthy. Fortunately, this is no longer a common belief (Except in France). However, this being the case when the Titanic was built, there were only two tubs provided in steerage, one for the men and another for the women.
  • None – they were predominantly Poms (as I was born in England I feel safe using slightly racist gags!). alternatively, there was one, known as the Atlantic Ocean.
  • None, but Howard has promised to install ten if reelected. Rudd will simply abolish third class, thus making the problem go away.
  • None, it was showers all the way.
  • None, according to the movie (the one that had Tim Curry in it)they had showers.
  • None. Some cabins had washbasins
  • None. If they wanted a bath the filthy swine should have PAID more money and gone first class. What is wrong with the lower classes these days. Let them all eat cake.
  • None. They all had a bath before they left.
  • None. They all had to use showers. SALT-water showers. “It’s our latest environmentally friendly version,” said Cap’n Smith. “No more desalination plants!” And in the first-class bathroom, squillionaire Sir John Houthworthleuthith was swimming around in serene solitude, in a 5m-deep pool of distilled water. He would have drowned, except he was very buoyant from all that beer…
  • None. They were English.
  • None. They were expected to provide eachother with tongue baths.
  • None. Bathing was considered dangerous to one’s health. Really.
  • One – but it was bloody freezing
  • One big freezing one.
  • One rather big one, eventually.
  • One real long one at the end of the voyage only
  • One very large bathtub. They were very friendly those third-class passengers. Perhaps a bit too friendly. It’s a little known fact that the Titanic actually capsized during a wild bathtub orgy in third class. The White Star line covered up the story of their immorality by fabricating some nonsense about an iceberg.
  • One. They wound up drowning in it. Just goes to show, you can’t trust the Steerage passengers to understand hygiene.
  • Only one – but it was a really big one to hold the coal.
  • Only the two. They didn’t call them the great unwashed for nothing.
  • Surely none – clean rabble = a contradiction in terms
  • Two- one for men and one for women. Of course those grubby steerage rabble didn’t bathe much anyhow since such activities were known to result in lung ailments and other unsavory diseases. Imagine the smell!
  • Two: one for the men, and one for the women and children
  • Two. One for the ladies and one for the chaps. Yewwww.
  • You want all the third class passengers to catch pneumonia, or something, Dr. Bob? Why would you even need a bath?

Question 2

The Titanic was coaled partly from other ships, there being a shortage of coal due to a strike at the time, and due to the great pre-voyage haste the coal was not properly wetted, and a smouldering fire broke out in one bunker. How was the fire put out?

Answer

By sinking the ship

Additional Answers

  • Sir, the bad news is that the iceberg has torn a great hole in the side of the ship, we’re taking water and will probably all die. However, I’m pleased to report that we’ve got that fire in Coal Bunker 6 out…
  • “Smouldering” is a so much better word than “smoldering”, don’t you think, Dr Bob? The latter conjures unpleasant images of John Brown’s body in its final resting place, so thank you for not pandering to your thousands of US readers by adopting Webster. (This has nothing to do with the question, the answer to which is that Leonardo di Caprio urinated on it after his steamy session in the car with Kate. The chronicles do not record whether Kate did likewise.)
  • 144 bottles of Guiness, carefully filtered through the kidney of the Irish Black Gang (coal shovellers)
  • By adding water
  • By carefully ramming an iceberg to let an enormous amount of water flood the bunker.
  • By properly wetting it. If it was a non-smouldering fire other means would have been sought.
  • by rapidly shovelling out almost all of the hundred of tons of coal from the bunker, which may have contributed to the Titanic’s rapid speed of ~23 knots/hr in an iceberg lane, as well as causing structural damage from the heat, although a stoker says it was never completely put out.
  • By the Titanic sinking – or by flooding the area with water, and removing coal. The reports seem to vary.
  • By using up the coal in the furnace. Obvious,isn’t it?
  • Celine Dion’s voice robbed the fire of oxygen and extinguished it.
  • I’d say 50 bonus points for anyone who can make an effective, witty Gulliver’s Travels reference.
  • Iceberg!
  • It probably wasn’t, but efforts would have been made to use up coal to get to the smouldering level and simply use that up also, thereby extinguishing the fire. It may have been the reason for speeding.
  • It was put out by Leo and Kate perspiring all over the place during the sweaty love making in the motor car scene.
  • It wasn’t.
  • Not enough coal
  • Opening up the hull so water could flow in.
  • Petrol
  • Please select which phrase you’s like me to make a pun from:1. “I’ll get to the bottom of this.”2. “I’ve got a sinking feeling.”3. “We don’t need no water let the mother f$#%#% burn.”
  • Sea water (as she sank)
  • Sealed the room.
  • Standard practise is to shovel the burning coal into the boiler which increases the steam and therefore speed of the ship. That’s a hunk ahunka burnin love right there!!
  • STOP THE COAL! STOP THE COAL! STOP THE COAL! STOP THE COAL! STOP THE COAL! STOP THE COAL! STOP THE COAL! STOP THE COAL! {splooging sound of a Proto-Greenpeace proto-protester pouring a bucket of molten polyester into the smouldering fire to pester the ship’s crew and passengers and yeh} STOP THE COAL! STOP THE COAL! STOP THE COAL! OH WAIT, THIS IS NOT A COAL-EXPORTING SHIP? OH WELL…
  • The captain valiantly steered his ship into an iceberg, filling it with water and putting the seam fire out. Unfortunately, the lads at Guinness weren’t into making world record books, so he missed out on worlds largest submarine.
  • The doors of the bunker were sealed and the fire put itself out by consuming all the oxygen in the bunker.
  • The fire burned for at least 72 hours while a 12 man team tried to put it out. It was so difficult to extinguish that there was talk of having NYFD boats fight the fire once passengers disembarked in the city. The fire was eventually put out (Just in time to avoid being extinguished by massive amounts of seawater) partly by wetting the coal with a fire hose and partly by shoveling the burning coal into the furnaces.
  • They hit an iceberg and it got extremely wet.
  • They sailed at full speed to drawdown the coal in the bunker until the smoldering coal could be extracted and fed into the boiler. Any sensible person would have just urinated on it.
  • They threw Mrs J. Stuart White’s brassiere on it, smothering the fire.
  • They used the bathwater saved by not having baths for the 700 third class passengers
  • Using the sweat of the working class
  • Water rushed in on the fire after the ship rammed into an ice berg
  • When the boat hit the iceberg, the fire went out by itself very quickly
  • With freezing water.

Question 3

On the Titanic, Fourth Officer Boxhall calculated its final position as 41*46’N 50*14’W, and having survived the sinking he spent the rest of his life defending these figures against criticism and revision. (Actually, the ship’s time was inaccurate; its real position was about 25km away at 41*43’N 49*56’W).  After his death in 1963 where, by his request, were Boxhall’s ashes scattered?

Answer

41*46’N 50*14’W

Additional Answers

  • As a married woman with an alarming insight into the workings of what passes for the male mind, I can guess this one: at the spot where he originally calculated that Titanic sank.That’s such a man thing to do, isn’t it, “I’m dead and I’ve been proved wrong but I’m not going to let this argument drop and nobody can tell me different now”, just say “Yes, dear” and let it go.
  • Over John Harrisons shop doorstep
  • 41*46’N 50*14’W
  • 41*46S 50*14E.
  • 41*46’N 50*14’W Too bad- he’ll have no company over there, even the corpses of the titanic passengers would have drifted in a different direction.
  • As close to Boxhall’s calculated position as was possible. Boxhall’s date of death is given as 1967 in Wikipedia: is that someone’s idea of irony? [No wonder they had such trouble burying him in 1963]
  • At 41*46’N50*14’W. is this the trick question? huh huh is it?
  • At sea! Looking for a more specific answer? His ashes were scattered at sea at the point he calculated as the final resting place of the Titanic: 41* 46’N, 50* 14’W.
  • At the intersection of the Greenwich Meridian and the Equator, so that he would never have to worry about calculating those stupid numbers again.
  • At the position where he though Titanic hit the berg
  • At the wrong location. Nah,too easy. Maybe in the furnace of another ship?
  • Given that the poor bugger actually died in 1967 I guess the right answer is “nowhere.” After his “second death” in 1967 (ANZAC Day, coincidentally) his Ashes were scattered at 41°46N 50°14W. Red Handed won the Melbourne Cup and Richmond won the flag. I was in Grade 2.
  • His calculated position seems like what he’d do. So, I’m going to go with Aruba- NO WAIT- Iceland.
  • I presume at the position he calculated. If it was like when we scattered my brother-in-laws ashes they blew back all over the scatterers.
  • In a box of chocolates. Obviously.
  • Inside the GMT clock. Boxhall wanted his ashes to slow time slightly in order that his calculations 51 years earlier would be deemed correct.
  • Naturally over the position that HE had calculated as being the final resting place of the Titanic which is 41*45’ N 50*16’ W. Consequently he was NOT reunited with his beloved ship – things went wrong with the Titanic until the bitter end
  • On his rose garden probably
  • On his wifes breakfast cereal
  • Over where he calculated the Titanic to be: 41*46’N 50*14’W
  • They threw him out with the bathwater
  • They were scattered where he thought the titanic sank. (He was right it just that the CIA and the US navy moved it to hide the secret submarine base which Elvis, JFK, Marilyn and now Diana all live.)
  • well given that his ashes were scattered I would hazard a guess and say over a 2 metre area, and possibly 25 kilometres from where he really wanted them.
  • Well, where d’you think. 41°46’N 50°14’W! Like many people, he remained true to his delusions for life.

Question 4

When the iceberg was first sighted, it was dead ahead, giving the officers of the Titanic a choice of two ways of avoiding it. Why did they veer the ship to the left (OK, port) of the iceberg instead of to the right?

Answer

It had 3 propellers, two revolved one way and one went the other, giving the ship a slight natural tendency to swing its stern out to the right, thus a left turn would be easier and faster

Additional Answers

  • Because if they’d hit it on the other side, it might not have put out the fire in the coal bunker without sinking the entire ship, and what would be the point then?
  • Because it was a British ship, and therefore the officers ‘kept left’.
  • Because of the direction of the propellers and in those days starboard was left.
  • because the captain said so
  • Because the letter “l” comes before the letter “r.”
  • because the order was to reverse the engines but also to turn to starboard. The result was to turn the ship to port. It has been suggested that if they did not turn the rudder at all and attempted to reverse the engines, the ship would hit head on and survived.
  • Because the term “starboard” had not been invented yet.
  • Because they were Englishmen, and Englishmen always dress to the left and keep to the left when they’re driving. Unfortunately, it was an American iceberg and naturally the iceberg was keeping to the right. Hence the collision.
  • Because they were told to go hard-a-starboard and the wheel used to be turned to starboard to go to port or some other nonsense (insert mandatory Irish joke here about it being built in Belfast)
  • Being in the maritime field, I would guess that the prop spun in a Clockwise direction, therefore turning to Port (left) would be a sharper/faster turn.
  • Collision convention
  • He was left handed (no, he ordered hard a starboard)
  • In an amazing incidence of prescience it was so the cameras could show Winslet’s and DiCaprio’s good sides.
  • In general disobedience of standard navigational rules to avoid striking to the right of the channel. Also the driver was left handed and pissed.
  • It was in the script, probably. Actually, Titanic was left of the centre of the iceberg so turn to port was best.
  • Law of averages favours the right handers, so I would say that a leftie was left in charge.
  • left was natural instinct
  • liberal commie pinko’s the lot of ’em!
  • Mainly, to avoid a huge icefield to the right – there was plenty of ice in the sea that night. More interesting is why Murdoch ordered the ship be turned ‘hard a-starboard’, when the ship then veered to port. This was because the convention came from when ship were steered by tillers. The convention related to the direction the tiller was to be turned, which would steer the ship in the opposite direction. Even though wheels had been used on ships for about a century by the time the Titanic sailed, the convention held.
  • Maybe because the lookout told them “iceberg right ahead” instead of dead ahead? Or they did paper scissors rock to decide.
  • On popular theory is because the fire in the hold was on the starboard of the ship. Another, better, one is that the captain was English, and drove on the left-hand side of the, er, sea, while the Iceberg held more continental views.
  • Prosaically, since a warning came from starboard and the order was hard a-starboard , but in theory to try to keep the propellers and rudders away from the iceberg
  • Sailors are quite fond of a good port, so are inclined in that direction if there’s a 50-50 choice in where they should point their ship. And ‘port’ is one syllable while ‘starboard’ is two, thus making a turn to port faster to order and execute.
  • Supposedly, the iceberg was spotted from the bridge, such that when the spotter called in the infamous “iceberg, right ahead” someone on the bridge had already given the order to turn to port. Indeed the crewman in the crows nest testified that the iceberg appeared to be slightly starboard of dead ahead before the turn to port commenced. Furthermore, since the crew were not Russian, their Crazy Ivan maneuver was to port in the bottom half of the hour…
  • That was towards the equator for a westbound ship. It is warmer nearer the equator.
  • the Captain had a glass of port in his hand at the time and it seemed like as good a side as any….
  • the captain was left handed
  • The first officer attempted to “hard-a-port” around the iceburg, basically turning the ship to port with the engines reversed to swing the bow out of line with the iceburg. The second half of the manuever involves cranking the rudder the other way to swing the back end of the ship out of the way. Unfortunately, there wasn’t enough room to avoid smacking the ice with the bow, but the second half of the manuever kept the burg from ripping down the entire side of the ship which would have caused it to sink much, much quicker. Interestingly enough, to call the turn to port (left), the First Officer told the helmsman to turn “Hard-a-Starboard” which meant to turn the ship to port. This is because steering a ship back then, the terms were still based on having a tiller attached to the rudder. If you pushed the tiller all the way to the right (Starboard), it actually turned the ship to port.
  • The helmsman was standing on the left side of the wheel at the time and it was soooo much easier on him to just grab one of the top rungs and pull than to walk all the way to the other side.
  • The ice field would have been expected to be denser the closer you got to the North Pole, so they steered away from the North Pole
  • The officer in command was lefthanded.
  • They noticed Mrs. White standing at the port side and were really sick of her complaining.
  • To avoid a bunch of proto-Greenpeace protesters wielding buckets of molten polyester (hypocrites! I thought they did not like plastic?)
  • When reversing the engines, 6th officer Moody ordered the wheel ‘hard-a-starboard’ which caused the ship to turn slightly towards port, consequently the iceberg scraped past on the starboard side – why did Moody order ‘hard-a-starboard’? probably because south meant ‘warm’ direction with less icebergs…who really knows?
  • Thats the way the unionist crew insisted they go, or they’d go on strike and stand still

Question 5

In one of the lifeboats from the Titanic, what did Mrs J.Stuart White keep complaining about?

Answer

The stewards were smoking

Additional Answers

  • A wet arse.
  • As a second class passenger, lack of bathing facillities.
  • Frost on the strawberries in her champaign
  • Going back to pick up passengers
  • Have you ever tried to do a round of Row Your Boat and someone just can’t do it. I mean how hard is it? Just pay attnetion to your part and keep the pace up. There’s what 16 words in the whole song? – less if you remove duplicates. And we are going for harmony not volume. You should especially keep your volume down if you can’t keep up with the rest of us. And who in God’s name has the kazoo?
  • Having to share a seat, and the cold
  • Having to share the lifeboat with lower class passengers.
  • Her boobies flopping about in the swell.
  • It was leaking and wetting her husband’s prosthetic leg. He himself couldn’t feel anything (small wonder: his leg was wooden) and so did not know what all the shouting was about.
  • Leonardo Di Caprio’s acting, and that he should get a haircut.
  • Mrs White was unhappy about the men on board the lifeboat, she felt them to be fraudsters who got rescued on account of saying they were oarsmen – who had never held an oar in their hand before
  • No loo
  • Crewmen who couldn’t row being in the boat instead of men who could row crew. (This answer is 1st class shit Dr. Bob. At least take it out of alphabetical order!)
  • None of the men in the boat were seamen. None of them could row and all of the ladies in the boat had to row. Perhaps sufferage was indeed alive and well on the Titanic!! [Quite the opposite – the “women and children first”and other forms of chivalry set the cause of women’s suffrage back about 5-10 years. There were no examples of women gallantly giving up their seats to men. It was not until after WW1 that it could be picked up again]
  • She was English, what didn’t she complain of. This boat is too small, this seat is cold, where’s me steward with me tea, when will this drill be over, have you seen the price of apples, bloody tory government, its all their fault,
  • That her cousin Stuart Little was left in the hold.
  • That some ruffian, likely one of the steerage passengers, had spirited off with the ship.
  • The amount of people in her boat
  • The behaviour of the men on board.
  • The behaviour of the menfolk – smoking cigarettes, using bad language, being unable or unwilling to follow orders or to row, not knowing the words to Nearer My God To Thee, arguing about where to have their ashes scattered, refusing to take the rubbish bins out, spending hours at the Playstation, hogging the TV remote, leaving the seat up, I mean really, I’m with her all the way, what’s *not* to complain about?
  • The bloody moaning of the dying. How dare they disturb her peace.
  • The cold water in her bath
  • The lack of champagne and the fact that the third class passengers had eaten all the cake (see answer to question 1)
  • The lack of drinking water
  • The persistent smell of urine and smouldering coal.
  • The seamen were smoking cigarettes and didn’t know how to row the lifeboat..she thought they must have been stewards posing as seamen
  • The smelly plebs [see Q1]: the stewards’ smoking
  • The stewards smoking. I would have thought they’d have been soggy?
  • The useless riff-raff of the crew who couldn’t row to save their lives (literally)
  • Too much ice in her drink.
  • What didn’t she complain about? First she was unhappy that the crewmen she had in her lifeboat started smoking like a bunch of slackers even before the lifeboat was cut loose from the ship. Then she complained that they had no idea how an oar worked, how to put it in an oarlock, nor had they ever rowed before. Finally she complained that when the one seaman who had any idea how to manuever a lifeboat started giving orders to the men, they threated to throw him out of the boat. I tell ya, she whined more than my ex-wife!
  • You have to imagine what it was like that night – they were on a sinking boat; lots of people were a bit intolerant. This was the first time fabulously rich Mrs White had come out of her cabin for the whole trip, as she’d been injured earlier. People seemed to think that it was a false alarm, and that must have been irritating. But worst of all, she had this cane fitted with a battery driven torch, and she was waving it about in an attempt to help. Unfortunately, all it did was to ruin the crew’s night vision effectively blinding them. Second officer Charles Lightoller ordered her ‘damn’ cane be tossed overboard; she believed it to have been stolen. So by the time Mrs White was in the life boat, she was extraordinarily cranky. Therefore she complained about pretty much everything, but especially the crew on the lifeboat for lighting cigarettes as the boat was lowered, and who, in her mind, despite never having rowed in their lives before, had put themselves forward as oarsmen in order to save themselves. What probably upset her more than anything was that the class barriers had broken down, a Countess was doing the tilling, and here was Mrs Ella White cooped up with what she thought were kitchen hands! However, it’s also possible that at 55, menopause wasn’t treating her kindly.

Question 6

This picture is from a movie – in what year did the movie premiere?

Answer

“In Nacht Und Eis” premiered in the winter of 1912.

Additional Answers

  • 1910
  • 1911 as a premonition movie
  • 1912
  • 1912 In Nacht Und Eis. But the best film is “Raise the Titanic” which was so expensive to make that Lord Lew Grade commented that it would have been cheaper to lower the Atlantic.
  • 1929.
  • 1939
  • 1943 (IMDB I hope you are right).
  • 1951
  • 1953. But that’s just a guess.
  • 1958
  • 1958. Ish. The difference between this one and the remake being that the iceberg looked plastic, whilst the cast didn’t. Although any fillum in which Leonardo di Caprio turns blue and sinks out of sight forever has to be considered to have at least one redeeming feature.
  • 1959, the movie ‘A Night To Remember”? [Wrong]
  • 1965
  • 1970
  • 1995, in my bathtub. Looks exactly like the toy Titanic I had as a child.
  • 2004
  • 2006. I made it in me bathtub.
  • After the sinking,probably. Rather than before[that would be spooky].
  • Aieee! Godzirra! But we’ll say it’s from ‘Atlantik’ 1929.
  • Being able to rule out years before 1912 and despite the impressive special effects I’m going to go with 1912.
  • Do we get partial credit for setting a bound on the year? I’m pretty sure |x – 1959|<47 if x is the AD representation of the year the move premiered.
  • I don’t know (refuse to google), but I know watching it felt like a year.
  • I love the strings on the model! Umm, the 1943 one?
  • I think 1958 or 1943 (the one with the heroic Germans!)
  • In Nacht und Eis – 1912. Isn’t it amazing the stuff you can find on the net!!!1!!11!one
  • It was The Brady Bunch’s recreation of the Mayflower voyage, filmed by Peter Brady on his Super-8 camera in 1967.
  • Must be from ‘A Night to Remember’ in 1958. Terrific movie, the more so because of the complete absence of Celine Dion.
  • On 16th of April 1953 – in the US
  • That is the epic scene from “worlds whackiest police chases XLVII”, which is in post-production and slated for a summer 2008 release. The other 45 instalments were because the producer (who, incidentally, is descended from Steerage passengers) didn’t know what came after “I”.
  • The 1929 film Atlantic shows the ship post-berg in daylight, but since all the sinking ship footage has been lost from that film, it can’t be that. It’s not the 1913 Dutch film, Atlantis, because they used a real ship, not a model with painted dots. Goebbel’s 1943 propaganda film Titanic would be a nice tie in, but it showed the boat sinking at night. STOP PRESS – Found it! It’s from In Nacht und Eis (Night and Ice), a German film released in 1912. Phew!
  • Yes
  • You know I listened carefully but could not hear any Celine Dion so I’m going to go with prior to 1968…

Comments

  • Bonus Question from last month: The Erie Tribe, which lived along the southern shore of Lake Erie, was conquered and exterminated by the Iroquois confederacy during the Beaver Wars in 1655.
  • 🙂
  • Crikey, this took me two weeks. I wanted to take it seriously and I still couldn’t find the right answers.Is it true they didn’t answer the phone on the bridge that night?
  • Dear Dr. Bob, I just hope that you are not skeptical (OK sceptical) that the Titanic really sunk?
  • Gee that’s a second rate model ship in the photo. The one you can hire from here is much better – (and more realistic) http://www.partyusa.com/titanic.htm
  • Gee, I thought this quiz would be tougher.
  • Ho hum
  • I hope I win.
  • I know that you believe you understand what you think I answered, but I’m not sure if you realise that what you read is not what i meant.
  • I quite enjoyed this one! It took me hours to find the answer to q.6 – I hope other people didn’t stumble over it in seconds.
  • I will try to think of some witty responses later in the month.
  • If I wrote the script for the Titanic, the movie would have been over in 45 minutes.”Oi, rich bitch fancy a shag”.”Alright, but don’t tell me boyfriend”.”What’s that?”.”An Iceberg”.”Shit””Gees, I’m cold”.BLUBB BLUBB BLUBBBFini
  • In Good Taste?Met him once, didn’t care for the company.
  • Ken Ham has his own security around his museum. No misbehavior will be tolerated!
  • Missed the October quiz, Dr Bob, due to an extended absence in France watching the Rugby World Cup and then recovering from the shock of the Wallabies losing same before my very eyes in Marseille. Talk about quelle bloody horreur.
  • My answers aren’t based on anything other than guesswork
  • My father, a long time mariner, wants to be buried at sea for the express purpose of preventing my mother from dancing on his grave. She says he’s only going to do it so that she can never eat fish and chips again.
  • My number be 731585. It is a very auspicious number, symbolising the spirit of the Sun’s hypoglycerinous circle of effervescent hypervalency, as transgressed through the cisternal perglobularity of the cosmic forces of metaphysical cucumber-shaped magical fields. Pity astro-numerology is not what it used to be…
  • thanks
  • thanks’ I’ll be back later
  • The Titanic, again. How about a different ship, like the Mary Celeste?
  • This Titanic obsession is so, so ‘Y’ chromosome. How about something more girlie, like mass poisonings?
  • Titanic questions are always fun.
  • Who cares about baths! Tell us about the swimming pool in the basement!
  • Wikigooglicious!
  • If anyone uses the phrase Titanic waste of time in the comment section they should be banned for life.Wait, no, aaaaauuggghhhhhh!