Answers for April 2005

This month I tried a little experiment – just to get away from Iceland, Hitler, the Titanic, Finland, Philip Glass, aardvarks and walruses … but it does not seem to have been a popular move. Never mind – _I_ have the keyboard (to paraphrase that scene from The Wedding Singer). We can’t afford to sponsor weeks in exotic locations every month, so this month we have a booby prize – a week in Perth! Well, Perth is sort of exotic. I went there in 1997. Then I found myself there again in 2001, so perhaps there was some mistake. I’ve been to Perth, Scotland which was very interesting because they have a fish ladder so the fish can get upstream, and you can watch the fish jumping along the sequence of ponds in the fish ladder. That is what you can do in Perth, Scotland. I found Perth, WA to be very similar to Perth, Scotland except that there is no fish ladder. Our WINNER this month recently had a birthday – so this could be a belated birthday present, take it away

Madge Mugliston

… who lives in … Perth. I can’t write “Madge, who comes from Perth” because you can’t. You’d die of thirst halfway across the Nullarbor Plain.


Question 1

What was Ivan the Terrible doing just before he dropped dead?

Answer

Preparing to wallop Boris Godunov at chess

Other Answers

  • Clutching his chest and making odd noises. But he was close to a chess board at the time. Otherwise why ask the question?
  • Living life as if his next moment was his last.
  • Breathing.
  • Dying, of course.
  • Dying. Hmmm… playing Chess? _Not_ playing chess? Being about to play chess but dropping dead before the first move? That last one sounds good.
  • Given the theme, I guess he was playing Chess. Or slaughtering people, or both.
  • He was alive
  • http://www.skygaze.com/content/mysteries/IvantheTerrible.shtml … Ivan was counting on his fingers and toes the number of people he killed during his reign. He would’ve needed more than his set, so he could’ve very well relied on the digits of the 3000 or so he killed. [Q: What happens if someone counts people they’re killing using the fingers of the dead people? A: Arrghhhhh (unless the first people killed all have only one finger]
  • I think you meant to ask “WHOM was Ivan the Terrible doing just before he dropped dead?” He was doing Mrs. Terrible, and that’s why he dropped dead. [And why was he called Ivan the Terrible?]
  • I would have guessed playing chess, but I’ve been told he was re-christened as the monk Jonah and buried in his monk’s habit – in the hope of finding ultimate forgiveness.
  • Laying sick in his bed
  • Metabolising. And, oh, this is just a wild guess prompted by nothing in particular, was he playing ….. chess?
  • More ‘who’ than ‘what’ – the chronicles record that poor Ivan the Terrible was doing Ivana the Thunder-Thighed when oblivion overcame him. And it is a little-known fact that the correct translation of his title from the Cyrillic is ‘Ivan the Incredibly Impotent’. Lucky for him that history has been so kind.
  • Most probably he was living his pityful, utterly immoral life.
  • Okay, this clearly seems a bonus question: just look at Q2, Q3, Q4 and Q5 (gosh, I’ve to check Q6…) and you can guess A1 without googling. However, by this point of view, Attila was quite wiser than Ivan, even if both are linked by Q6 of February Quiz. Ivan died while playing with a subject of that pic, while the Hun king died while playing with the other subject.
  • Playing a game of chess. See http://www.xs4all.nl/~kvenjb/madrus.htm#grosny
  • Playing chess.
  • Playing chess. An ancestor of Bobby Fischer caused Ivan to have a stroke by moving each piece slowly and gently with his finger raised as though drinking from a dainty tea set. And by arriving seven minutes late.
  • Preparing for a game of chess
  • Reading the latest “Answers in Genesis”
  • Screaming in excruciating pain
  • Standing?
  • Starting a game of chess…pieces and board made from mercury amalgam…hmmmm.
  • Taking monastic vows. Does that mean he was just monk-eying around?
  • Terrible IvanDid something prior to death.I do not know what.
  • Vigorously performing “The Circle of Life” in a VERY early stage adaption of The Lion King. Being Ivan the Terrible and all, he was mown down by projectiles from the theatrically-uneducated audience of warriors.
  • Well, he didn’t actually drop dead, he rather sort of leant to one side at first, and then his leg sort of collapsed underneath him and he slid down.

Question 2

What difficulty did José Capablanca encounter in his first public game of chess?

Answer

(Dr Bob’s answer) Was very young & could not lift the heavier pieces
(Everyone else’s – evidently there’s a web page somewhere) Was very young & could not reach the table.

Other Answers

  • A lack of altitude. Fortunately, this was remedied by his father, who sat him on a stack of books so that he could reach the table and thus the board. (Do not try this with easily excitable children; a bibliophile’s nightmare is only a leak away.)
  • Absence of a chessboard.
  • As the phone was still relatively new the phone book was only 3 pages long. 500 phone books had to be stacked so it was high enough for him to reach the board.
  • Couldn’t reach the board…needed a booster seat!
  • Dyslexic announcer botched both his names calling him, “Joe Casablanca”
  • Excessive flatulence.
  • Had never studied a chess book on game openings. See http://www.chessclub.demon.co.uk/culture/worldchampions/capablanca/capablanca.htm
  • He couldnt find anything on the web that explained his first game.
  • He did not know how Knights moved. Damn them and their little three steps then one step pattern. Gets me every goddam time.
  • He had never studied any of the standard games of chess.
  • He had to sit on a pile of books to reach the table
  • He probably could not see over the table (as he was only 5 years old at the time)
  • He was but a young (and therefore short) lad. They had to boost him in his seat with books. That is not to say that he had lost to his opponent, who was the Cuban champion at the time…
  • Hé was in acuté distréss. [But he was capabla of getting out of it]
  • He was only a child. So he was too short to reach the board properly.
  • He was too short to see the chess pieces, so they had to stack books on his chair.
  • He was too short, they had to pile books on the chair so he could reach the Chess board.
  • He was too small to reach the board? Maybe he was so young they had to, I dunno, get him to stand on a pile of books or something.
  • I guess that he was too young to be allowed in the venue.
  • Identifying all the different pieces and distinguishing between the opponents pieces and his. He would have also noticed, scratching his head, a bucket next to the table with chess pieces in it, even though the board is already set up!
  • Jose can’t play chess.He gazed upon his pieces.”What do I do now?”
  • No toilet?
  • People kept telling him to “play it again, Jose”.
  • Performance anxiety
  • The crowd busting out laughing at his absurd name.
  • The game was in English, while poor Jose only understood Spanish chess. But, he got by thanks to a smattering of English moves he’d picked up from re-runs of the Simpsons on local TV. What a relief for Jose that the game was not in incomprehensible Icelandic – he would have been finnished.
  • The opening went a bit rough; he missed several good tactical chances in the midgame (move 29 and following especially) and he sweated heavily during the endgame.
  • Too short to sit in chair.
  • Uh… I may guess also that without googling, perhaps. The good ole Jose Raul learned chess when he was four (just looking his dad playing), so I imagine that his worse problem could be to have the chessboard in a position higher than his nose. However, maybe it is better if I google a bit…
  • Very young – could not reach the board
  • His opponent was a naked icelandic woman, and the chess board was in an impossible position with two kings next to each other!

Question 3

What were the moves in the shortest officially recorded game of world-class chess?

Answer

1. Resigns (Fischer-Spassky 1972, first match)

Other Answers

  • Brilliant
  • Few
  • 1.c4 – black resigns.
  • 1.Blow cigar smoke into opponent’s face. 2. Lift stunning marble inlaid chess board and toss at ignorant upstart opposite. Marble smashes into 64 cubes. 3. Call ambulance.
  • 1.d4 Nf6 2. Bg5 c6 3. e3?? Qa5+, 0-1.
  • 1.d4 Nf6 2. Nd2 e5 3. dxe5 Ng4 4. h3 Ne3
  • 1.e4 f5 2. Nc3 g5 3. Qh5 mate Mansfield v. Trinks, 1961 US open.
  • 1.Knight to king’s bishop 3. 2. Colt to opponent’s temple 0.45. 3. Brains to corner wall any-number-you-like.
  • 1.d4 e5 2.e3 *reaches across table and throttles white*
  • 1.d4 Nf6 2.Bg5 c6 3.e3 Qa5+ and White resigned. As one would. Actually it has happened at least twice. Djordjevic vs Kovacevic in 1984 and Vassallo vs Gamundi in 1998. (http://www.worldchessnetwork.com/English/chessNews/articles/blunders-2.php).
  • A left-right upper cut combo.
  • Cock pistol, shoot head off opponent.
  • 1.g4 e5. 2.f3. Qh4#
  • I remember one game where one player was losing rather early in the game. So, he flipped the board and starting running, hoping the other players wouldn’t catch him and pummel him before he got home. Oh wait- that was Risk. But wouldn’t that make chess more interesting to watch?
  • Its just a jump to the left, and then a step to the riggggght, with your hands on your hips, and your knee’s in tigggght……………
  • Let’s try also this without web-searching… It seems to me that a Grandmaster (Torre? I’m not so sure…) versus Bobby Fisher replied to Bobby’s 1.e4 with 1. (Resign). However, I’m also sure that there are several 1.e4-e5 (Tie game). In my personal opinion, the true record is however the second game of Fisher-Spassky match, where we can consider the Fisher’s forfeit as 1.(Resign). Absolute unbeatable record, I think.
  • No moves – draw. Them grandmasters do stuff like that. Probably the reason why chess isn’t much of a spectator sport.
  • Possibly this brilliant 7-move checkmate from a world-class chess tournament (perhaps you can tell me who played it, I only remember the moves): 1.e4 e5 2.Nf3 d6 3.Nc3 Bg4 4.Bc4 Nc6 5.Nxe5 Bxd1 6.Bxf7+ Ke7 7.Nd5#I wouldn’t expect it to be the 2-move checkmate: 1.f3 e6 2.g4 Qh4#, but perhaps a variation of it like this: 1.f4 e6 2.Nh3 Qh4+ 3.g3 Be7 4.xh4 Bxh4#.
  • The match was Jose Capablanca versus Naked Icelander. The moves were: 1 – Jose’s eyes to girl’s bust. 2 – Girl’s lips smile flirtatiously. 3 – Jose’s hand to girl’s bust. 4 – R rated things. So, the answer is 0, because they never got around to playing any actual chess.
  • The posteriors of the players were in the squatting position when some miscreant pulled the chairs out from under them. You had to be there. It wasn’t pretty.
  • There are lots of forfeited games, which therefore had no moves. For instance, a memorable one was the 1972 Fischer-Spassky tournament, where Fischer refused to come to the table unless the cameras were removed. The adjudicators started Fischer’s clock on time. Half an hour in, the camera people declared they would not film. Fisher then demanded his half hour back, which wasn’t granted, the clock duly ran out and the match was awarded to Spassky. The shortest game in which at least one piece was played was probably one between Bobby Fischer and Oscar Panno in 1970. The moves were 1.c4 2. black resigns. The shortest game played through to the end was Djordjeic – Kovacevic, in 1984, comprising 3 moves:(1.d4 Nf6 2.Bg5 c6 3.e3 Qa5+ winning the bishop).
  • Volatile Melodramatic Russian seized board and beat Equally Precious American about the head with it whilst E.P.A. attempted to stuff pawn up V.M.R.’s nose on account of What He Said About Our Ronald.
  • White King’s pawn moves two squares. Black queen’s pawn counters. White queen moves 3 squares diagonally, I don’t know the numbers or anything, Checkmate.
  • White lays down King.
  • White moves pawn to K4, blows kiss at Black. Black lamps White and resigns.
  • Wookie rips arm. Droid runs away

Question 4

At the 1972 Fischer-Spassky match, the games started at 10am. Bobby Fischer generally arrived at about 10:07 (when he arrived at all). Why?

Answer

He would wake up at 10, realise he was supposed to be playing chess, get dressed and hurry from the hotel to the venue. This took 7 minutes. (Imagine being able to fall out of bed, and within 7 minutes proceed to beat the world chess champion.)

Other Answers

  • At 10:06 he wasnt yet there and by 10:08 he was already there.
  • 1. The dude is nuts. 2. It made the other dude nuts.
  • Because he didn’t find chess interesting without any naked icelandic women.
  • Because he was a hungry James Bond fan and anything close to 007 and morning tea was just fine by him.
  • Because he was crazy as a shithouse rat.
  • Because he was in the early stages of clinical eccentricity.
  • Because Bobby Fischer was really really bitchy. After demanding double the prize money for that match he then still refused to play it, citing reasons of too much media attention. Even after agreeing to turn up to Iceland for the match, his second spent 4 hours convincing him to play at all. That 7 minutes was taken up by him getting into an argument with a cameraman whose existence Fischer despised.
  • Bobby claimed that he could not wake up until half an hour before the game.
  • Does it really matter? Spassky started without him! [But, he couldn’t play very far into the game could he]
  • Fashionably late.
  • Fischer was tardy.Why was he incourteous?I have no idea.
  • Gamesmanship? Camera shyness?
  • He claimed he had to sleep until half an hour before the game, however that didn’t give him enough time to get ready, so there was always some delay.
  • He didn’t like the television cameras? See http://www.mark-weeks.com/chess/72fs$$.htm
  • He had to comb his hair before having to face the cameras for the televised match.
  • He played second.
  • He slept in after arriving in Reykjavik late (would not have arrived at all if he had not been persuaded to do so by Henry Kissinger)
  • He was extremely anxious and arrived at 10:07 the previous night
  • He was on SBF time
  • His numerologist told him that this was the right time.
  • His watch needed the services of a master watch maker – Swiss preferably.
  • His watch was on Greenland time.
  • I know this one! I really do! This was meant to annoy the opponent.
  • Just about any reason he could think of. The food. A misplaced tie clasp. Last-minute game preparation. The right tie. Finding a good ballpoint for recording the game.
  • Probably trying to annoy Spassky and gain a bit of advantage.
  • Sheer whimsy
  • The bus ran late, his watch lost 7 minutes no matter how carefully he set it, he was confused by Daylight Saving and the dog ate his homework. No, hang on, those were my excuses for being late at school. Um, because he was a Precious American?
  • To annoy Spassky.
  • To show what a nasty, immature, stupid boor he really was.
  • To unnerve his opponent, or because he slept in.
  • To unsettle his opponent.
  • Uh, really? That sounds new for me, but I am ready to believe it. Let’s guess the reason… maybe there is a gospel verse 10:07 with some special meaning? Or maybe his intention was to win the match with a 10-7 score? Or being 10=J and 7=G he wanted to remark “James God”, being James his second name and his pseudonym?
  • The extra 7 minutes were how long it took him to complain about everything…when he never arrived, he was busy complaining about something in Iceland, although that’s rather difficult to believe, as all of Iceland is perfect in each and every way.

Question 5

At the 1972 match Bobby Fischer complained about the style of the chairs, the cameras and the lights, the first ten rows of spectators, the noise of children unwrapping sweets, the size of the 64 squares, the size of the pieces, and what else?

Answer

… and the colour of the black squares. Among yet other things.

More Complaints

  • About Spassky obviously.
  • Anything else he could think of at the time – probably his own tinnitus, which he attributed to the running sound of the film cameras.
  • Argh! Keep that shiny table away from me!
  • Bob is a whinger.He wants a nude Icelander.There’s no pleasing him
  • Especially money, and the fact that there wasn’t enough. And because it was in iceland, and that made him feel cold. And the mean other player kept winning.
  • He wanted his play clock reset to zero after arriving late.
  • Hemp underpants, Spassky’s BO (They didn’t call him BO Boris for nothing), the lack of entertainment, food, sleeping conditions, women, drink, poor tv reception, clocks, and by the way it way it was the first seven rows.
  • His opponent’s breathing.
  • His opponents loud tie
  • His penis size
  • Morning tea being consistently late.
  • No, this is a trick question. He complained about all, especially about money, however. My best guess for this question comes from this article about the hotel pool, that he wanted reserved only for himself: “Bobby, who for years shunned women in favor of his trusty chess board and Bible, will probably be most annoyed by a pair of revelations. First, that during off moments in Reykjavik he frequently took to the mineral baths with a pair of adoring young lovelies in bikinis. And second, that for six months thereafter, while secluded in a California compound run by the Worldwide Church of God, he not only dated but, at his request, was introduced to “vivacious” girls with “big breasts.” ”
  • Peanut vendors were selling Planters brand snacks when the contract clearly called for only his Fischer brand snacks. Dr. Bob, there are really 204 squares on a chessboard, or infinitely many depending on whether you are concerned with the grid printed on it.
  • Pretty much everything else. Including the prize money the TV rights and the next 10 rows of spectators.
  • Spassky resigning a match by telephone. See http://www.mark-weeks.com/chess/72fs$$.htm
  • Temperature of the room
  • That he should have the swimming pool in the hotel to himself.
  • That he, spoiled brat that he was, couldn’t think of anything else to throw childish tantrums about.
  • That his opponent conceded by telephone? The camera team? Not getting a share of the gate money? A lack of bowling alleys near the venue? Soviet manipulations? The view from the hotel being too beautiful? That his car wouldn’t start? All of the above?
  • The 10am start time.
  • The ambient noise. In particular, high pitched noises that only he, bats and dogs could hear.
  • The clock was not on SBF time
  • The colour of the sky, the humidity of the air and the density of water.
  • The lack of naked icelandic women.
  • The light fixtures (they pulled one down and found that there were 2 dead flies in it)
  • The money. It worked. (Hmmm, say Dr. B. I refuse to post any more answers until you double the prize for winning.)
  • The presence of oxygen in the room.
  • The price
  • The psychic energy being directed at him by the Russians.
  • The quality of the bog paper in the loo.
  • There was a dearth of Icelandic nude women in the first ten rows of spectators. That, and something about a lack of bowling alleys in Iceland, but mainly the utter absence of nekkid wimmen.
  • There were brown M&Ms in the bowl.
  • What didnt he complain about would be a better Popperian question. Leon’s cooking … no one ever complains about my cooking. I am a jolly good cook. Well I’ve never heard any one complain but I am a trifle deaf. [As in, “I say old chap, why do you have jelly, sponge, raspberries, almonds and whipped cream sticking out of your ear?” “Please speak up, I am a trifle deaf.”]
  • Whatever was left.
  • William Lombardy was said to have remarked that he could not understand how Spassky could tolerate Fischer’s behaviour. Anyhow, in answer to your question, the only other thing Fischer complained about was that Spassky resigned by phone and not signing of the scoresheet.

Question 6

Picture question with lady fully clothed and NO CHESS. This is a recent appearance of Australian psychic Sharina at an “alternative festival”. What is happening?

Answer

Because of an unforeseen power cut, the lights went out and the PA system went dead. The lights stayed out and the PA system stayed dead. After a few minutes in the dark and silence, everyone began to drift away.

Other Answers

  • A live radio broadcast. They can use the whiteboard because Sharina broadcasts its contents telepathically to the listeners. After reading this I can’t tell whether this is a ‘real’ psychic show, or a show that makes fun of psychics. Which is it? [It’s both]
  • A spirit (probably a deceased husband or parent) is linking in to one of the ladies (the reader) on stage and is passing on a message from beyond the grave. In summary they are well, the afterlife is good, and they want the living (the readee) to be happy. They pardon the living for any misdeeds performed against them. The readee will then apparently go away happier and “healthier”, but probably with a lighter pocket after paying entry and then buying the book, “self help” tape and T-shirt. Alternatively they could be having a good chuckle as they discuss the fatal error of play demonstrated in the chess moves from Q3, which so commonly come up in polite conversation at psychic festivals (got to think of something while running another “cold” reading).
  • Ad for “Psychic Thrush detection”?
  • Ah yes a classic picture. There is Sharina with an audience member getting their picture taken by a sceptic. But the lights had gone out (unpredictably) so they totally missed seeing all the fantastic orbs that whizzed about in the dark. Couldn’t predict a cup of tea at my Gran’s place.
  • Checking if Eve was made from the spare rib
  • Did you really just describe Sharina as a psychic?
  • Everybody in the picture is wasting their time
  • Extortion
  • Fools and their money are being parted.
  • Huge hairy beings, pictured in the foreground, are moving in to eat her, which she didn’t psychically foresee.
  • I can’t see the picture but am sure Sharina shows selfless sacrifice by sportingly sharing her sisterly secrets with sceptics and their spouses, sons and siblings. For free, of course.
  • I thought she was summoning orbs which can be seen in the top right. And then Google gave me the full picture (http://www.mysteryinvestigators.com/richard/), she’s failing to foresee the lights going out.
  • I’m not psychic so how would I know? [Through science, lad, through science. You see it is dark in the room? That tells us that the lights have gone out. Or, alternatively, that the darks have come on.]
  • Mind-Probing.
  • Nothing Paranormal
  • Nothing!
  • Sharina appeared.Is this meant literally?I stay skeptical.
  • Sharina has turned the blackboard into a whiteboard by psychokinetic energy. The woman in the blue skirt is asking where the toilets are located. Sharina is in the process of moving the toilets to the stage.
  • Sharina is predicting that the person in the third row will never learn that the flash only is good for about 3 meters. This person and her cousins visited Greece this summer. Maybe you saw them at the Olympic opening ceremony.
  • She cain Wallk! She cain Wallk! Praise da Luord! Brothers and sisssters.
  • She Confest it was all a ruse? (Confest – what an appropriate name)
  • She is psychically predicting that you will put some naked women into your next quiz (chess optional) in order to cater to a certain female who does your quiz religiously.
  • She is READING MY MIND
  • She’s being shown up as the fraud she is. Also the red haired lady in the front row is laughing at the dodgy stage set-up.
  • She’s checking that lady. Or maybe she’s mating the lady. I am always in trouble with English… Checkmate in a lot of languages simply means “The King is Dead”, in english sounds to me as someone trying to test someone else for a comfortable intercourse.
  • She’s giving out chess moves.
  • She’s predicting the woman will soon visit Iceland and meet Bobby Fischer who will tell her she is incredibly stupid because she isn’t a man.
  • Someone is being conned?
  • Thanks to sceptic Gillian Brown at http://www.mysteryinvestigators.com/archive0205.htm, it seemed like Sharina was doing a rather bad job of cold reading before the auditorium was hit with a blackout. While most people in the audience were spared from seeing or even hearing Sharina, seemed like the psychic herself was not aware that she was going to have to shout to her faithful.
  • The photo is a bit hazy to tell for sure. My guess she just guessed the colour of the lady’s bra (white).
  • They are not engaging in the game of chess. Or sex. As far as I can determine.
  • They dont like lesbians at the world feminism talks so she is being verbally bullied with many harsh put-downs
  • This is an old fashioned swindling. Sharina is be saying all sorts of possibilities, then picking up on cues from her victim’s faces to work out what to say next.
  • Well… a toughie, this one. Sharina seems to pass the time with numerology and Tarot cards, but looking at the picture, it appears she’s reading the palm of some volunteer from the audience.
  • What’s happening man. (Um where, when? – at the moment I’m doing a dumb quiz.) Looks like an oscar presentation. It’s all done with smoke and mirrors.

Comments:

  • “It is a mistake to think you can solve any major problems just with potatoes.” D. Adams, whom I miss terribly.
  • All this Fischer/Chess stuff, you just can’t keep away from Iceland can you? You’ll be asking us about cucumbers and strawberries soon, or which son came on as a substitute for his dad during a football international. And long may it continue!
  • Answers in Haiku:An interesting concept.Too bad all are wrong.
  • Bring back the nudity!
  • Did you hear about the exploding German toads? They crawl out of their ponds at between 2 and 3 am, swell up and boom! Maybe the Swedish will find a way of canning them. [Evidently the German have already found a way of limiting when they can come from the ponds]
  • Did you know that Ivan the Terrible had the same number of wives as Henry VIII, with the same results – 3 died, 2 divorced, one outliving?
  • Did you know that non-chess-playing computers call IBM’s Deep Blue “Dweeb Blue” behind its back?
  • Dr. Bob, The April questions are deceptive – they appear to be about chess, when in fact, you’re fixated on chess because of Bobby Fischer – who was released to ICELAND from his detention in Japan; who beat Boris Spasky while playing in ICELAND; and most important of all, Bobby Fischer resides in ICELAND as AN ICELANDIC CITIZEN no less! And, lesser known, he was born on March 9, my Grandmother’s birthday.
  • Even though Sharia probably couldn’t predict a cup of tea at my Gran’s place [I think you mean Sharina. If you really meant Sharia, then your Gran wouldn’t be allowed to have tea. She’d be getting stoned in the streets. Gosh….] my Gran predicted things with tea leaves. Well one thing. She always said “you are going on a long journey”. Soon after I was on a boat to Australia. I wonder how she knew? Maybe my dad told her.
  • First, my compliments for your success in putting Iceland also this time inside the quiz (I’m sure you know that Fischer is an Icelandic citizen, now). Second, let me recall to you that in Turin, on 2006, we’ll have not only the Winter Games, but also the Chess Olympiads. Should I book some tickets for you, Dr.Bob?
  • For some reason the pictures no longer work on the site, I don’t understand this
  • I don’t know anything about chess. I thought this would be about quack subjects. Have a nice day.
  • I dont like chess [Then use the opening from the first Fischer-Spassky match of 1972: …. 1.Resigns]
  • I have an URTI. [So does my randy mate Albert, but he doesn’t keep it clean. It’s flirty Bertie’s dirty URTI]
  • I think that I aced it
  • Is it because the match was in Iceland, or because Fischer is now Icelandic? How hard it is to be inspired, humerous or indeed stay awake on such scintillating questions. [You should worry? I have to set them!]
  • Melbourne psychic The Ethereal Eulalia will now psychically determine the topic of a book Dr Bob has read lately. The spirits tell me that it’s a book about …. chess! Thank you, thank you, you’re too kind, feel free to make a donation to my cosmic coffers on the way out.
  • My best friend is Icelandic. I almost watched “The Seagull’s Laughter” on SBS last night, but I was too tired to watch it. Does this give me a better chance of a high score? [You don’t need a high score if you have already saved the time you could have wasted by watching the film].
  • Pawn to King Four. Unless you want to be white, Dr Bob. [Yeah, Ah sho’ would]
  • Reasonably easy to google. Can’t wait to see what you come up with for next month 🙂
  • Right now what’s happening is I’m relaxing a few minutes at work during lunch. Later this weekend I’ll coach my daughter’s soccer game. Probably the family will go out to eat one evening this weekend. As spring is here we are starting to think about what to plant in our garden. Grandma is still doing well. What is happening with you Dr. Bob? [All the opposite: I’m not relaxing, I am assembling quiz answers when I should be doing some work. I missed lunch. My daughter is in a game, I only wish it was soccer. Oh, and your family EAT?? … we only eat stones (oh really, we used to dream about stones, etc). It’s not even spring, it’s autumn, and I can’t remember what I planted in the spring, maybe I smoked it. I wanted to play with Grandma, but my mum said no, you’ve dug her up twice this week already.]
  • So anyway, there I was innocently trying to search for the music to the children’s classic “The Cat Came Back”, since I’m trying to teach my kids. And so I typed:’ “cat came back” “real player” ‘into Google (with the quotes to get the exact phrases). After the third page it was all porn. Every single page. Fascinating. [Yes I checked this out and I agree. I particularly like the lady with the big norks]
  • Sorry Uncle Bob but I find Chess penetrating as in boring: probably my lack of patience (dislike that game too)and/or intelligence. See you next month.
  • Thank you so very much for not having naked ladies in the quiz this month, may they be fully clothed from now on.
  • The new Skeptics site sucks, Dr Bob. Click-throughs don’t work, the pics won’t come through, the quiz results are either late or unreadable or both, and the site’s previous laconic good humour has vanished in favour of polemic and proselytising. It’s a real bummer when a sceptic like me becomes sceptical of the Australian Skeptic’s scepticism.
  • There’s some amusing cartoons of the 1972 Fischer-Spassky match here: http://www.chesschamps.com/lastshow.php
  • We are trying to buy a house from someone at the moment who’s a total psycho in the Fischer mould. He wants the deposit up front paid to him, not the agent. He wants to stay in the house for four weeks after settlement. And he is trying to get us to pay extra for any fixtures he can, like the roller door motor, the 10 year old in-ground sprinkler system, some of the shelves fixed to the walls in the garage and, would you believe, the electricity meter! And finally he insisted on meeting us personally to try to bully us, and after that rang our number 8 times… He’s apparently terrified that the sale won’t go through and doesn’t trust the legal system. And he has our number. So if you stop getting quiz answers from me, you’ll know what happened…
  • Why are all the questions about chess? i thought this was a skeptic site not a nerd site. [Oh crikey … you want the REST of the site …]
  • Yo Yo. [I have days like that, too.]
  • Still got Iceland into the quiz, didn’t you!
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