Answers for August 2001

Our WINNER this month is another long term, unsung trivia maniac

Robert McMartin (required)


Question 1

If a baby is born during an international aircraft flight, what nationality would it be?

I asked the UN for advice:

An international aircraft in flight is considered to be its own country, so the child would belong to whatever they call the plane. If the plane is airborne and passing between countries, the child’s nationality is that of the aircraft’s captain, not that of its parents.

Norwegian Answers:

  • Aries.
  • Never mind where the baby is born! What happens when the child is conceived on an International flight? [Quite a stir, I imagine. They’d have to get the seat upright again in time for the landing.]

The Taliban Blew Up My Web Page:

  • A baby what? Human? Horse? Cow? Okapi? Lesser Sumatran Orang Utan? Please be more specific, Dr Bob!
  • Airmenian? SovJet?
  • Any of: the mother’s nationality, the father’s (if he was on the plane), the country owning the plane, the country directly underneath, the country of departure and the destination. [All wrong]
  • Boeing? [Only if it’s a bouncing baby boy]
  • Cloudbaby.
  • Esperantian.
  • From the United Nations ‘Convention on the reduction of statelessness’ we get: “For the purpose of determining the obligations of Contracting States under this Convention, birth on a ship or in an aircraft shall be deemed to have taken place in the territory of the State whose flag the ship flies or in the territory of the State in which the aircraft is registered, as the case may be. ” So if the infant is not granted nationality by the state to which the parents belong, it automatically is granted nationality by the state where the aircraft is registered. Surprisingly, the aircraft does not have to be in the air for this to apply, or even in service – so if you were to set up a maternal ward in the derelict hulk of a Qantas jet stranded on a coral atoll, all the babies born therein would be Australian…
  • I didn’t think women who are about to give birth were allowed on international flights? [Correct, although it depends on the airline. Probably if you were a first-class gold advantage platinum flying frequenter, and had actually paid enough for the ticket, you could be as pregnant as you wished. Air hostesses can do most things, but not deliver babies. They have to get the tray table back up when the plane is due to land]
  • I’d guess this would probably follow the same rules as being on international waters (hopefully on a boat, not a plane). So then the baby would be assigned the nationality of the vessel they were traveling on, unless the mother is a U.S. citizen, in which case the baby is also a U.S. citizen no matter where in the world it’s born.
  • If the plane is over international waters, then the child becomes a citizen of Atlantis, and must be duly thrown out to join other citizens…
  • Possibly that of the airline, depending on how greedy the government is for tax revenue.
  • Same as the plane’s country of manufacture. If born on a B747 then the sprog would be a Yank; if on a Concorde then would have dual Pom/Frog citizenship (if sprog survived the flight, of course); if on a Yak15 then would be Tibetan…
  • Skychild.
  • Statistically it would most likely be Chinese or Indian as they comprise about 90% of the world’s population give or take a few. But then again your average Chinawoman or Indian probably couldn’t afford an international flight. So who knows…
  • That of his/her parents, by the rule of jus sanguinis. [This sounds like a fun law to have. You could be caught in flagrante delecto, I mean delicto]
  • The child would belong to the airline company, of course. When it reaches the age of 18 it has to work for free for the airline for 25 years to repay them for letting it be born. [No -that’s Scientology you’re thinking of there]
  • The country the baby GETS OFF in, so that it gets a legal birth certificate. [In fact, somebody getting off was the original cause of the problem]
  • Virgin Atlantic.
  • Welsh, obviously! [Yes. It’s usually obvious that there’s a Welshman about]

Question 2

If the Earth’s rotation (about its own axis) were stopped and all rotational energy converted into heat and evenly distributed throughout the planet, how much hotter would the planet get?

Tiresome Scientific Answer:

Rotational energy = 2.10^29 J; Mass = 6.10^24 kg, Specific heat of iron & nickel = about 0.1 calories per gram per degree (1960’s school units) = 420 J/kg/K. So from 33,000 J/kg we’d get a temperature rise of about 80 degrees. This question was in a Cambridge entrance examination, but I doubt if the answers were as good as some of those below. I never did fancy Cambridge anyway.

Even More Tiresome and More Correct Answer

If the earth was stopped then it wouldn’t be rotating. So it’s zero degrees

Hot Answers:

  • 1 degree C
  • 100 degrees
  • 2*10^29 joules. Now that’s a lotta joules! Unless the joules are really very, very, VERY small, in which case it works out to only a handful, perhaps only enough to fill a teacup. My calculations work out to about 3.56 cubic fortnights per second, or about 2.2 BSH (British Standard Handfuls).
  • 2.5 degrees celsius – really, we tried it over the weekend
  • 200 degrees.
  • 40 degrees
  • 5 degrees celcius
  • 500 degrees hotter
  • A lot.
  • A pleasant, balmy 39 degrees C [As in a “classic Queensland winter day”?]
  • Are you planning on trying this, you evil genius? Don’t forget the maniacal laughter.
  • As much hotter as it would have to be to convert it to a molten mass – so said Clarence Darrow while examining W. J. Bryan in Dayton, Tennessee, USA, in 1925, about the “Joshua” long day story.
  • Ask a silly question…
  • Difficult, but let’s try it. How do we proceed to stop the globe again?
  • Do people actually spend time calculating things like this? We have much more to worry about than the temperature should the Earth suddenly come to a grinding halt!
  • Doesn’t matter, since the earth is going to get warmer anyway because evil Anglo businessmen are going to chop down the rainforest and pollute and kill us all unless we give all our money to pay off Third World debt. At least that’s the UN’s position.
  • Don’t know, but I’m willing to bet the people on the planet would all throw up suddenly. I do when I get off the roundabout or when I play on the whizzy things.
  • Dunno, but I bet it would still be cold in Tasmania.
  • Eeek. [? sound made by planet grinding to a halt?]
  • Enough for it not to be a planet any more, rendering the question moot.
  • Good grief. Well, hang on, what about the fact that half the earth would now have concentrated sunlight and the other half no heat at all?
  • hmm multiply by a factor of umm then carry the 5 and don’t forget to add the ahh woops – stuff it – 0 degrees something
  • Hmmm, Pi r squared times 18,000mph divided by radiation loss on the dark side of the stopped planet multiplied by gain on the sunny side less the tidal effects of the orbiting Moon plus the universal constant equals…42. Degrees, that is.
  • Hot enough that it would be too hot to answer this question.
  • Hot enough to boil an egg? [Yes, and frighten the chicken too. And cook the goose]
  • Hot enough to melt the walls of Jericho (or was that the one about the Louis Armstrong wannabe?)
  • Hot enough to stop worrying about the Kyoto treaty.
  • Hotter than a kettle of rocks on my Aunt Fanny’s gas stove. [This sounds like a sexual allegory or metaphor. Well, it does to me anyway. “He thew her down on a pile of hay, ripped open her bodice, tore off his already-bursting jeans, hung up his wooden leg and placed a kettle of rocks on Aunt Fanny’s gas stove”. Nah, I’ll stick to doing trivia quizzes]
  • I know the pattern here. Whenever you ask these sordid physics-type questions, the answer is always “42” aka The Hitchhiker’s answer to life, the universe and everything. Okay, assuming the earth weighs a watery 1 x 10^25 lb, measurements at the equator, etc., rotational energy = kinetic energy so that’s about 6.5 x 10^29 Joules which is roughly 6 x 10^26 British Thermal Units (BTU). If 1 BTU raises the temperature of 1 lb of water by 1°F then that’s a temperature increase of 42°F, give or take. See! Bloody hell, why did I bother. Wheres a gun.
  • It will be: (earth’s rotational energy x earth’s mass)/(average specific heat of the earth). Now, the earth’s rotational energy is 2 x (10 to the 29th) joules, the mass of the earth is 6 x (10 to the 24th) kg, and the average specific heat of earth materials is assumed to be about 1000 J/kg. And that all comes to…. 12 x (10 to the 50th) degrees C. Just you remember that every time you import a hippopotamus. [You multiplied instead of dividing. A trivial error … but if I were a hippopotamus I’d avoid you]
  • Let me think – if I’m riding my bike downhill at 60kph and I put the brakes on to come to a complete stop and feel the rims straight after, they’re pretty hot. In this case, not all the energy turns to heat, some turns into sound, so the amount of energy available to convert to heat is even higher. I’ll be modest and say the combined weight of me and my bike is only a microscopic fraction of the earth’s so by extrapolating this experience to fit the whole earth, I reckon the temperature would rise thousands of degrees, turning the crust into globs of gooey lava and wiping out all life as we know it.
  • Lots. Everything would be burnt to a crisp, so it wouldn’t matter much anymore.
  • Not as hot as John Howard’s present situation.
  • Not hot enough to make England warm
  • Not hotter at the surface as most of the heat would go into the already really hot core of the earth
  • Not very much. A few degrees, tops.
  • Oh you silly boy you. Are you not aware that we are the centre of the universe, and everything else revolves around us? Therefore the answer is zero. [No – if the rest of the Universe were brought to a halt and all its rotational energy about the Earth turned into heat, a lot of things in the night sky would heat up. Actually there wouldn’t be any night any morre. At breakfast time you could make toast by pointing a slice of bread out of the window at the Andromeda Galaxy.]
  • Precisely what mechanism do you suggest using to stop the Earth’s rotation? Conservation of angular momentum and conservation of energy mean that it would be impossible to achieve. If you could do it, which you can’t, then the temperature rise would be about 40°C
  • Quite a bit, I’d imagine. As the Earth weighs a lot, and at the equator, the spin speed is bloody quick, that works out as momentum of some bloody big number, if we then convert this to joules, we get an even bigger number, if we then divide this by the surface area of the earth we get a smaller, but more significant number. This number is quite big.
  • Somewhere between 1e-99 to 1e99, maybe.
  • Too hot for comfort, but the thousand mile an hour winds would tend to cool things a bit.
  • Very Hot. Just look at the bonus photo in Q6

Question 3

In doctor’s scripts to pharmacists, what does the abbreviation “ADT” denote?

Correct Answers:

  • According to the Dictionary of Medical Abbreviations, ADT means “Any what you Desire Thing” meaning the prescription is for a placebo.
  • “give this faker a placebo”
  • ?
  • “Add Dragon’s Tooth”
  • “All done today”. Doctors still haven’t got over their inferiority complex.
  • A Dopy Twit. Placebo medicinal therapies required.
  • Admission Discharge Transfer – i.e. we have no idea whether this patient should be in, out or shaking it about, so give them these drugs…
  • ADT written in lower case letters (adt) means it is ok to substitute an adulterated drug for the pure one in order to save money.
  • Aggressive Drug Treatment or Actively Destroying Tellytubbies or maybe it’s just the doctor’s handwriting and its actually GIP (Give Idiot Placebo).
  • And Don’t Tell
  • Another Dead Thylacine
  • Another Doubting Thomas
  • Another Druggie needing Therapy
  • Any Damn Thing.
  • Give this wacko some fruity water in a bottle and he’ll feel better by the morning… It’s short hand for placebo.
  • I am guessing here that it is an abbreviated Latin phrase meaning “once daily” or something like that. Alternatively, in these days of economic rationalism, it is more likely to be some sort of cost centre code so that expenses can be correctly attributed to the user / client health provision account.
  • It is a code to the pharmacist to pay attention when making up the prescriptions “Attention Dumb Turd”. It is to remind the pharmacist that he better not mix up the haemorrhoid cream with the Dencorub again.
  • It’s a warning to the pharmacists- “annoying, depressed troglodyte” who will give the pharmacist the shits whilst filling out the script.
  • It’s from a chiropractor’s script, not a real doctor. If you can read it, a real doctor never wrote it. I dunno what it means though. Perhaps “Another Dunderhead Treated”

You Need A Psychoanalyst, Not A Doctor

  • About our Date Tonight
  • After Dinner Time?
  • Always Dilute Toxins, indicating that the person with the prescription is a hypocondriac.
  • De Doctor’s write de notes mon, so he remembers dey are meeting After Dinner Tonight, for some evening nookie, mon.
  • He’s asking the cute Pharmacist chick for “A Date Tonight?”.
  • meet you down at the pub after work

Equally Plausible Answers

  • “Any drugs, Terry?”
  • A Doctor Thing, it’s not important to me!
  • A Doctor’s Treatment
  • Adreno Di Thalidomide
  • ADT stands for “Active Death Therapy” and means that the patient holding the prescription is a “problem” for either the physician or insurance company (in the USA) and is to be given a lethal quantity of the drug.
  • Adult Diptheria and Tetanus, but most of us pretend it is an emergency and get it from our Doctor’s Bag Supply
  • Advanced delirium tremens
  • Advanced Dental Techniques [meaning, smile nicely at the patient, he’s an axe murderer and will top you if he gets angry]
  • Afghans Detained on Tanker
  • Alcohol Drugs and Tobacco research. Usually referred to as part of prescribing for heroin trials.
  • Alternate Day Therapy. Instead of small daily doses of a drug, bigger doses on alternate days are used.
  • Am Dead Tired, and that’s why you can’t read their handwriting.
  • And Die Trying
  • Anno Dimitriades Triumph (you probably can’t understand it either, but hey, that’s doctors for you!)
  • ANTIDISESTABLISHMENTARIANISM. It is all part of a medico-Masonic conspiracy.
  • At designated time.
  • Diphtheria and Tetanus Vaccine, Adsorbed. Standard older child or adult immunisation. And you thought that computer boffins had cornered the market on acronyms!
  • Finnish Antidoping Committee (AntiDoping Toimikunta). Usually in EPO scripts for cross country skiers, where ADT should not be informed.
  • The queen mother wondered that, too, after a doctor she saw about her embarrassing flatulence problem and numb brain prescribed infinite repeats of “ADT”. This turned out to be jelly babies the first time, followed by a copper bracelet, cotton wool, bunion pads, normal saline, really tacky sunglasses and latterly, strictly suppository homy peds. Tragically, she still hasn’t taken the hint.
  • Ummmm. Abominable Dictography Tried, Ask Double Tax, Anus Definitely Treatable, Acute Dimple Taken, Anugly Dimple Taken, Adverse Digit Torsion, Allow Double Toxicity or perhaps Active Diphtheria Toxin.
  • Attention deficit…say, did you see that? Wow! That’s the best one of those I ever saw. Now, where was I?

Question 4

For the bomb dropped on Hiroshima, where did most of the uranium come from?

Detailed Answer:

From the Belgian Congo as uranium oxide (yellowcake). Thence to Chicago University, Illinois, USA, where it was refined into a purer metal form. Thence to Los Alamos, New Mexico for manufacturing into part of an explosive mechanism (the Trinity test and Hiroshima were uranium devices, Nagasaki was an untested plutonium device). Thence by rail to San Francisco where the two parts were loaded in separate lead-lined buckets onto a battleship that took them to the island of Tinian, south of Japan. There the technicians of Project Manhattan loaded them into the bomb casing, and the bomb was loaded into Enola Gay. The final trip was from Tinian to about 35,000 feet over the Town Hall of Hiroshima then a sudden drop to about 1850 feet, after which it was all rapidly dispersed …

Alternative Answers:

  • Most of it came from the Belgian Congo, now Zaire. Therefore if possible we should blame it on the Belgians. “Most of it” indicates they were scrounging U235 from all over the place.
  • America… that’s where they built the damn thing isn’t it?
  • Australia. You had to get one in, didn’t you?
  • Big Tim’s Uranium Depot and Used Car Lot located in El Paso Texas.
  • Canada
  • Canada or Czechoslovokia. I don’t have enough time to double check my answers on this quiz.
  • Earth
  • Oak Ridge, Knoxville, Tennessee. I’ve no idea where the uranium ore came from, though.
  • From Eldorado via Clinton. (Mined at Eldorado mine, Canada and refined at Clinton (Oak Ridge), Tennessee.)
  • From the little bit in the middle when the thingummy that goes around the inside gets lit by the fuse that the bombardier lights, then everything goes KABOOM!! Or Canada.
  • Germany.
  • Harry Truman’s backyard.
  • I know where it ended up! In Hiroshima!! (Damn I’m good).
  • Ironically Japan
  • I’ve got a sneaky suspicion that most of it came from Australia. A lot of uranium ore was needed to extract pitifully small amounts of the active ingredient, U235, but they were able to extract enough to scare the shit out of everyone. Australia has got tons of uranium ore and we were pretty much willing to do anything to get the Japanese off our back doorstep back in those days so…. Australia is my answer.
  • Originally, the Big Bang. More recently, from somewhere a bit closer to home.
  • Out of Africa
  • Roxby Downs SA.? Ranger Mine NT? But I don’t actually think they were functional in 1945- So its probably something ironic like Japan. There’s a uranium mine in Africa somewhere.
  • Supernovae, billions of years ago.
  • The Belgian Congo. There is a furphy that it came from Radium Hill but they didn’t start mining uranium there until the 1950s.
  • The ground … in Australia. Has to be. Just when you thought you only had to feel guilty for the atrocities committed against the aborigines.
  • The uranium for the Hiroshima and Nagasaki atomic bombs was obtained from an old Canadian radium mine in the Northwest Territories by Eldorado Nuclear Ltd., a crown corporation specially established to supply the USA with uranium for the Manhattan Project.
  • Utah

Question 5

The late Princess Diana carried an amethyst crystal at all times to treat “lead poisoning,” and she told everyone that it worked quite well. Why did she believe that she suffered from lead poisoning?

My Psychic Tells Me:

  • She believed that she got the lead poisoning when a sharp pencil was poked into her cheek.
  • The name “amethyst” is derived from a Greek word meaning “not drunken” or “sober”. It’s a pity this didn’t apply to the driver.
  • Because if she didn’t, she wouldn’t be carrying an amethyst, would she?

Add These To The Legend

  • Around 1994 in Hungary, paprika stocks were adulterated with a “minimum” amount red lead oxide that obviously found its way into Buckingham Palace. Of course, that’s the official story. Much more believable than Di admitting to eating old lead pencils, licking the old painted walls and, of course, using lead pipes for her colonic irrigations. The amethyst? It’s obvious, amethyst is blue, Royal Blood is blue so …
  • As evidenced by her blind belief in psychics and the like she was as mad as a cut snake and must have realised it. Lead poisoning can lead to mental disorders I seem to recall. By the way what happened to Di’s psychic on the days leading up to her car crash? Having a holiday or perhaps just out of form? [They were right in form, delivering useless and expensive advice up to and after the time of her death]
  • Because she had the brain of a newt. The victim of a tragic sharp lead pencil school room incident, Princess Diana credited her lead poisoning with causing her dreadful drooling and stupidity. She was quite right in one respect. The amethyst crystal would have cured the ongoing effects of the pencil stab, because of course, there were none.
  • Because the person selling her the crystal realized she was gullible enough to believe it?
  • I don’t know, but she should have been more careful about handling Al and Merc.
  • Living in London (pollution)
  • Mr Temple, 84, said he gave Diana an amethyst crystal to help her mentally and physically after he treated her for lead-poisoning, apparently caused when she pierced her right cheek with a sharp “lead” pencil as a school girl.
  • Paranoid schizophrenia
  • Perhaps one of her lesser known hobbies was lead-lighting, which she undertook in her more youthful days without the correct protective clothing.
  • Plumbing in Buckingham Palace
  • Prince Charles’ pencil had no lead in it.
  • She believed she suffered from lead poisoning as a result of having eaten copious fistfuls of Charles’ hair, which she ripped out of his large head on their wedding night.
  • She got poked in the cheek with a pencil. Which cheek, I wonder, and who was in position to do it? Why haven’t the tabloids exposed this scandal?
  • She suspected she was being slowly poisoned by the Royal family and when they realised it was taking so long for her to depart this earthly plane, due to the mystical powers of amethyst, they decided to speed things up by installing faulty seatbelts in a black Mercedes. All so Elton John could sell a few more records. [Actually the seat belts were working perfectly well and saved one life. But you have to put them on. All those psychics, and not one said “Put the flaming seat belt on”]
  • She used to chew on the end of her “lead” pencils but was unaware that they are actually graphite, and thus it would take a very, very large amount to give her lead poisoning!
  • She was a hypochondriac?
  • She was bonkers.
  • She was prescient. She actually died from inhaling the battery of Dodi’s Merc.
  • The short answer? Because she was a twit. The long answer? Because she was jabbed in the cheek with a sharp pencil when she was a kid. Now, if only they’d jabbed just a tad harder, the world could have been spared that whole bloody funeral business.
  • Well known fact that the Queen Mother had a contract out on her…
  • Well, if she believed she suffered from lead poisoning, then how come she told people the crystal worked quite well?
  • When she was in the Red Cross she thought she had been exposed to nuclear radiations
  • When she was young she was jabbed in the left cheek with a “lead” pencil. Obviously the amethyst crystal worked – she was never poked in the left cheek by a “lead” pencil ever again. Honestly, Diana was one of the more likeable and “brighter” royals (which is why they offed her in a Paris road tunnel) so it’s ongoing astounding that some Australians still want to kowtow to the remainder, who are such a bunch of chinless upper-crust Pommy dimwits.
  • Working in the city. [Er, um – working?]
  • You can’t marry Prince Charles and not suspect that there’s something wrong.

Question 6

(Photo of large crowd of nudes) Where’s this?

Answer:

It’s in Montreal. Spencer Tunick (b.1967) specialises in photographs of nudes in public places. http://www.cs.concordia.ca/~faculty/grogono/tunick-pictures.html

Alternative locations

  • Tasmania, many times
  • Christmas Island
  • A performance at a street corner somewhere… The true question is: what did it do to the real estate prices?
  • A sunbathing day for Scottish silkies.
  • America
  • Amsterdam
  • An Army barracks in Rome. (One can clearly see Gen. Italia in the middle of the pic.)
  • At the point where the “naked people slick” actually struck land.
  • Big Brother 2 auditions.
  • Brazil
  • Can’t be too far away. I can smell it from here!
  • Clinton’s Retirement village
  • Damn Echelon spies! Now I have proof they’re watching me … and in my own back yard. Wheres a gun.
  • Deary deary me. This is in George Bush’s head, as the fantasy of a neutron bomb aftermath. My gosh, is the one in the fourth row from the top left, third across, about to go into labour? She doesn’t look comfortable.
  • Don’t know, don’t care but where can I get tickets from? [http://www.spencertunick.com/contact.html]
  • Dr. Bob’s backyard
  • Gee those chicks are so hairy they have to be dutch- or indian. wasnt it the 1000 nudy people display in ermmm … canada? Hey Bob!!! check out the chick two up from the lamp post. Totally anatomically correct for a chick, even got a map of tassie – like a chick – HAIR like my wifes moustache! Notice how they are all turned? Like we look at their faces!
  • Hey! You shouldn’t be taking photos of my private parties (and private parts) to celebrate record-breaking attempts.
  • I don’t know. Are they waiting for the aliens to beam them up?
  • I have no idea, but as soon as you tell me, I’m booking the flight to visit there. Maybe Germany where nude sunbathing is quite socially acceptable?
  • I think it is Toronto where some photographer dude (Spencer Tunick?) decided to make a controversial artistic statement by making it look like tons of people had been simultaneously massacred without their clothes on. It’s art, only if it challenges you and changes your emotional state.
  • If all the men in the world who’d had their penises cut off were laid end to end . . .
  • In Canada, somewhere
  • It’s on the steps and pavement in front of the Montreal Museum of Contemporary Arts, and it’s on a page in some american weekly magazine (you can tell by the two creases). It’s not: “God’s frying pan”.
  • It’s the aftermath of the Battle of Atlanta in the upcoming all-nude remake of “Gone with the Wind.”
  • Jones Town
  • My place after last saturday night’s party. Seems I put a little too much vodka into the Jelly Shots. Still can’t complain too much seemingly people came from miles around to see what I had done with the place. Will be featured garden in an upcoming House and Garden, or was that Orgy and Debauchery, can’t remember, my head hurts.
  • Not New York City. The authorities (read Mayor Guilliani) did not want nude people laying out in the public. It is one of a series of photographs showing crowds of nudes at notable locations all over the world. I don’t recognize the street lamp style or the paving bricks, so I give up.
  • Note sure where it is, but it’s a photo of the morning after one of those 1000 couple wedding celebrations the Moonies have. I should become one, really.
  • Nudes Against Nukes demonstrating on Hiroshima day.
  • One of those plastic factories where they make … well … you know, THOSE types of inflatable dolls. This is a batch being left out in the sun to let the paint and hair-glue dry. I shall not, in all decency, tell you how they are tied down so they don’t blow away. [There is an urban myth about someone transporting 12 helium-filled dolls for a party. Tarp blows off the ute and they all take off. The driver is scruffy and has long hair and a long shirt. A passing motorist thinks its Jesus and the rapture has started, and tries to join in. Or maybe it’s true and we all missed it.]
  • Paris. Not the one in the USA, nor the one in Canada. It is Paris in France to which I refer. And that’s the France in Europe. (Although it’ll probably turn out that it’s really Paris, France County, TX, USA.)
  • Pubic lice sufferers’ convention, 1999
  • Sardinia. If you look closely, I’m the second one down from the left in the upper right hand corner.
  • Some distance above and to the right of a large group of recumbent exhibitionists.
  • Some place where everyone is very careful about where their hands are.
  • Somewhere in the Netherlands, Denmark or Sweden. They’re always getting their gear off in those countries.
  • That’s me, down and left from the lamppost. [There’s a lamppost?]
  • The Annual Kentucky Fried Human rotisserie convention. Unfortunately some of them went to sleep and didn’t roll over at the right times. (What is that woman at top left doing with her feet – and the man with the spread legs by the lamppost – mother! hand me that magnifying glass.)
  • The exhausted aftermath of the world’s biggest lesbian orgy.
  • The Holding Yards at the Soylent Green Refinery.
  • The Kent Hovind prayer meeting in Pensacola, Florida.
  • The morning after the Mardi Gras before.
  • The national conference of the Bob Katter for Prime Minister party. This is the “over my dead body” splinter group.
  • The opening ceremony of the World Nude Scrabble Championship on the steps of the Sydney Opera House.
  • The reject yard at ACME Mannequin factory.
  • They really should keep the Queen Mum off the gin. There they were, just 2500 faithful Lillybet fans, all decked out in their union jack gear and looking like grinning fools, and brrraaap, there she blows. Next thing you know, there’s 1000 bodies flat out with nary a Spencer, nor Tunick between them. It’s a worry, really. One spark indoors and there’ll be dickensian “foul yellow liquor” all over the walls and just a pair of feet in pastel blue pumps and remnants of support hose left.
  • This is in a carpark in southern england. We gathered there to have some fun, but some loony with a camera made us all lie on our backs and not move. They said he was a famous modern artist or something, but I reckon he was just a voyeur. His camera lens was awfully sticky by the end of the day.
  • Times Square.
  • Tory Party HQ
  • You tell me, please…..

Comments:

  • No, you go first.
  • (sticks fingers in ears) La la la la la! I can’t HEAR you! La la la la la!…
  • Any chance of indicating your favourite answer of the month so that we poor losers can see what heights or depths we could aspire to? [OK, that’s a good idea. When I have time, which isn’t now, I will create a Hall of Fame with IMNSHO the very best answers. Psychoanalysts will have a field day.].
  • Didn’t the federal government ban stuff like that bonus question from the internet?
  • Do you go to family reunions looking for a date? If so, join One Nation now!
  • Do you print all of the answers? [No. Only the bad ones]
  • Do you provide close ups for the photo in next weeks quiz? Purely for research. Particulary the two lovely ladies in the centre and slightly to the left.
  • Due to time constraints, future quizzes will eventually be multi-choice. Call me a psychic, and send me (a) cheque, (b) money order or (c) credit card details. [Dr Bob’s answer: (f)]
  • Gosh, didn’t know this was a porn site. Incidentally, it would be nice if this form didn’t have a “referrer” header check, or the header check was in the same domain as the form, since some browsers suppress referrer headers for security reasons. [Whssshh – sound of concepts flying over top of my head – now I’m the one without a clue]
  • Hey uncle Bob! It’s me again!! I was just Bobbin’ in to chek on things here and there, you remind me of my ex-teacher (he left teaching the college after more then 20 years there), his name is Bob and he votes #1 the nazie party (to make the voting time longer). Do you think that actually works Bob? Are you skeptical of cigerets causing lung cancer, cuz he also smokes? Did you know I’m 18 years old Bob? I don’t think you’re quite as smart as you say you are you know, these qestions are all shite, get some proper SKEPTICAL ones, like “How many bones are in a T-Rex?” or “If a tree falls an there’s no body around to witness it, did it really fall?” ARG!! And get a photo of a UFO next time and ask “How was this effect created?”. Luv ya uncle Bob!
  • Hi Bob. There is a new classification for Queensland weather. “Classic Queensland winter day” which means 20 Deg or better, slight breeze, puffball clouds. Just thought you might like to know.
  • Hoobie.
  • Hurmph
  • I have always wondered what you do with all the optional comments, Bob. [Have you seen the flensing yards at the Soylent Green factory?]
  • I visited the Soylent Green Factory, you should see the flensing yards. Ohh nasty.
  • If a bear shits in the woods, who gets to claim the turd? [It’s yours]
  • If any of you should happen to encounter Dr. Tim M. Berra while he’s in your continent, please make him feel welcome. Tim is Professor Emeritus of Evolution, Ecology, and Organismal Biology at the Ohio State University at Mansfield, Ohio, USA, and author of “A Natural History of Australia” (San Diego: Academic Press, 1998). He was awarded research grants totaling nearing $10,000 American dollars from the National Geographic Society (USA) and the Columbus (Ohio) Zoo Conservation Fund to the study the life history of nurseryfish, Kurtus gulliveri, in your Northern Territory. Berra is the author of “Evolution and the Myth of Creationism: A Basic Guide to the Facts in the Evolution Debate” (Stanford: Stanford University Press, 1990) , an excellent still-in-print defense of science. Berra is living proof that scientists can find time to both do basic scientific research and defend science from pseudoscientific attacks, refuting scientists who say they don’t have time to do both.
  • If you are going to put photos of nude human bodies in your quiz, Dr Bob, how about at least using photos of attractive nude human bodies? [I do, but they are in the members-only section. Yes I am over 18, even if my mind’s not. Click here to enter! Thousands of teenie nudie virgins desperate to bonk – and fascinated by trivia! … such as my body parts.]
  • I’m fully confident that my answers will once again provide much laughter in an otherwise too serious world. I’ve given up long ago actually getting the answers correct. Though I’m quite certain about my answer to question 4 this time 🙂
  • Is Dr Bob in the bonus picture question? [Yes, but I’m hiding behind the light pole. I am very coy]
  • I must say I am deeply disturbed by the not-so-abstract phallic representation to left of screen in the bonus picture question. It may be ‘just a light pole’ to you…
  • Jeez, Bob, when you give us a little internet nudity you don’t muck around, do you?
  • Much apologies if this was supposed to be a serious quiz. [Yes, from me!] I don’t know the answers anyway, but it would be interesting to know them.
  • My non-obligatory/voluntary/non-compulsory/discretionary commentary/note/remark/observation for physician/medico/MD/honorary title Nod/Bounce/Dip/Bobble is: Gee I like my new thesaurus. [Feed it on some carboniferous ferns. give it a pterodactyl once a week and it’ll grow to be a fine specimen].
  • No questions for cunning linguists this month?
  • Ooh! Naughty pictures!
  • Question #2 made my brain hurt, Dr. Bob.
  • Sarcasm is the lowest form of wit. Last month’s fart joke, however, is up there with Swift. Honest. [Before I revel in undeserved glory, I must point out that that particular witticism comes from the Pitjantjatjara culture]
  • The quiz is the only thing that keeps me getting up in the morning. That doesn’t make sense to me, either.
  • This is all too silly.
  • This is the first quiz I’ve ever done. No-one told me about the skeptics website before, and I wouldn’t have believed them anyway. What do I get if I win? [Well, it helps to be skeptical about prizes]
  • This is very hard! […… no, I won’t say it this month]
  • We tend to scoff at the beliefs of the ancients. But we can’t scoff at them personally–to their faces. This really annoys me.
  • What a picture! Magnetically aligned naked people! [They tried it in Melbourne, but when a tram went by …]
  • Where on earth did you get that photo? Classy.
  • Who got the Pitjantjara question right? And, HOW???
  • You have finally done it, Dr Bob. I can’t get one bloody answer. I don’t have hours to spend with search engines as many people so obviously do. [That was never the idea of the quiz – ohhh, way too late]