Answers for February 2012

ANSWERS for February 2012. Winner is our Korean linguist –

Alan Needham


Question 1

Why did the directors of the film Sneakers (1992) add some extra Rude Words into the script?

Answer

To prevent it getting a G rating and thus being thought of as a kids’ movie.

Additional Answers

  • To remind the little bastards the movie may have a cute title, but t’is for bloody ig’uns.
  • Having heard of sneakers but having never heard of “Sneakers”, and noting that as a pure and unadulterated person of good breeding I do not know (and would not admit to knowing even if I did) any Rude Words, I fear I have failed the first question and therefore the entire quiz. Sigh…
  • Sydney Poitier had a bout of Samuel L Jackson’s (SLJ) disease and asked the writers to write his uncontrollable cursing into the script to cover it up.
  • They just appeared once the script was typed up. They should have known that an actual computer would take offense at such nonsense.
  • To stop it from being thought of as a kids movie probably
  • ulido al-ayo dangsin-eun bagsa bab salgo eodie issneunji = We know where you live, Dr. Bob

Question 2

King Adolf Frederick of Sweden died after a meal of lobster, caviar, sauerkraut, kippers and champagne, but what really killed him off?

Answer

Fourteen servings of his favourite dessert – almond cakes

Additional Answers

  • 14 buns of the non-rabbit kind, but really cancer from his snuffboxes.
  • A type of sweet Swedish bun, in hot milk, of which he ate over a dozen. As kings go, that’s a good death and sure beats a sword up the arse.
  • Fat Adolf died at the hands of a female assassin who could stand his public gluttony no longer. Her name was Jenny Craigersson.
  • The bill
  • The king of the lobsters angered by the death of his wife rode through the five kingdoms of Lun’che. He garnered and inspired the assistance of the egg people, the pickled cabbages of the moors and the fish people of the smoky mountains and attacked King Adolf at dawn. The grape-men were too busy driving dune buggies to care.
  • dangsin-eun munhwajeog-in gamdowa jongyeong bujoghabnida = You lack the cultural sensitivity and respect

Question 3

The Nazis disliked Shakespeare and nearly banned his plays, except for two: the Merchant of Venice (obviously) and which other play?

Answer

Macbeth. Probably too strong a resemblance – and Himmler could be Lady Macbeth. I’d have thought they’d have banned that wimp Hamlet.

Additional Answers

  • Hmmm. Propogation of another stereotype, Othello?
  • “Midsummer Night’s Dream” because it was full of Rude Words that the Nazis thought were rather clever. ‘Bottom’ and ‘Titania’ tickled the fascist fancy but, because Hitler wanted to take the piss when making small talk on English culture in Munich with the lisping Neville Chamberlain, the real reason the Nazis refused to ban MND was due to another character. As it turned out, the Nazi ploy worked a treat. Adolf casually asked Nev about some of the main characters in the play, and Chamberlain chose to respond with “Phuck ‘n’ Bottom”. The chronicles record that Hitler thought it was so funny that he immediately invaded Poland.
  • Cats (The Musical).
  • Hamlet doesn’t sound like a very kosher name to me, so I’m sure the Nazis liked that.
  • Hamlet, which was deemed pleasantly unkosher.
  • melbeoleun-eseo uli yowondeul-i yeoleobun-i jinliui nun-eul meolgehago jeon-eneun gimchiwa jabonjuui gaeleul meog-eul geos-ibnida = Our agents in Melbourne, you are blinded by the truth before the dog will eat kimchi and capitalism.

Question 4

Of what holiday destination was it said (approximately) “It’s not quite like Torremolinos yet”?

Answer

Pyongyang

Additional Answers

  • Gaza Strip? Iceland? 370 miles SE of Mistaken Point, Newfoundland, the resting place of the Titanic?
  • Blackpool. It’s not quite like any holiday destination, including Torremolinos.
  • I don’t even know where Torremolinos is – probably Spain. Being the Dr Bob quiz, I’ll say Iceland – or Aruba…
  • Pre-Torremolinos.
  • Since neither Hitler nor Iceland are popular with the Brits, it has got to be the Titanic. And that one has indeed been not as popular as Torremolinos since about 1912.
  • dangsin-eun dwaeji usji ma. modeun geos-i jal hangug-eolo beon-yeogdoeji anh-eum . daedab-eun pyeong-yang eobs-seubnida! = Do not laugh, you pig. Not all is well translated into Korean. Pyongyang is not the answer!

Question 5

If a North Korean writer (motivated towards becoming old) needed to delete or edit the name of Kim Jong Il, how was this to be done?

Answer

The name must not be casually deleted – draw a circle around it then delete the whole sentence.

Additional Answers

  • ‘Eternal President’ in bold font, ‘big daddy-o’ in less bold font, ‘schizoid megalomaniac’ in their own blood.
  • After his death
  • Anonymously.
  • As all things when one is motivating getting old, one must do it using interpretive dance.
  • From South Korea.
  • igeos-eun geonbangjin jilmun-ibnida . widaehan jidojaneun jayuleul salanghaneun modeun salamdeul-ui ma-eum-e yeong-wonhi sal geos-ida = This is a cheeky question. Great leaders who love freedom will live forever in the hearts of all people.

Question 6

quiz201202q6



This is Yonggwang station, of the Pyongyang subway system (as featured in my March 2006 quiz). Apart from its wonderful ornateness, for what other reason are foreign visitors usually shown this particular station?

Answer

It is believed to be the only station of the network that actually exists.

Additional Answers

  • To scrub out the graffito ‘L’ over the ‘Y’. Yonggwang means ‘glory’, teehee.
  • It is where babies come from.
  • It’s the only one that works
  • It’s the only Subway in Pyongyang, and where else would you go to grab a quick sub? Except the South Korean coast, where they tend to wash up from time to time.
  • The shiny trains in the pic are the only newish rolling stock on the Pyongyang metro, so much better to show these to evil foreigners than the ancient ex-GDR rolling stock used by the rest of the system.
  • manh-eun hangug-indeul-eun-i geonmul-eul jibulhagi wihae gulm-eoissda. ulineun oegug-in gwangwang-gaegdeul-ege gippeum-eul gajyeoda ulineun huisaeng-eulhage doen geos-eul jalangseuleobge saeng-gaghabnida. = Many Koreans have starved to death in order to pay for the building. We bring joy to foreign tourists, we are proud to sacrifice.

Comments

  • I missed last months, and after your most recent comments I was afraid that the quiz would be no more. Glad to see it’s still here!
  • uliui jaemiissgo ttatteushan hwan-yeong-eul nodong suyongso-eseo dangsin-eul gidalibnida. god dangsin-eulbogo sipseubnida! = Our fun and a warm welcome awaits you at the labor camps. I would like to see you soon!
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