Answers for November 2010

ANSWERS for November 2010. This month’s WINNER is another long-term fan, from Austria, not Australia; and about bloody time too – well done –

Benjamin Huber

Question 1

If you were driving in the USA in 1955 and you saw a roadside sign that said, simply “Four” – what would the next sign say?

Answer

“And Five” (part of a Burma Shave advert)

Additional Answers

  • /And Five.. From the ads put up by Brush-less bush shavers – Burma Shave
  • And five, stupid sign.
  • “And Five”, followed by “Burma-Shave”
  • “and Twenty”. It is a little known fact that the famous MCG cholesterol coffins were invented in Melbourne, Florida, and appropriated by Melbourne, Australia, in a fit of pique after the Yanks refused to put beetroot in their hamburgers.
  • “Hospital 2 miles ahead on right. You were warned!” or maybe “Three”
  • *Flour.
  • Golf club next right
  • For this part of the quiz / the answer, you see / can only be / something like this: / Burma-Shave
  • koff
  • -play, some crazy golf reference I am assuming
  • ‘Way’ as in four-way stop. But the way yanks spell, it could also be ‘play’.
  • What do you mean, the roadside sign _said_ “Four”? Roadside signs didn’t actually start talking until 1971 when the drugs kicked in.
  • Whoa that was a close shave I nearly missed this one…”And Five”

Question 2

What happened in Beaver, Pennsylvania in 1792?

Answer

(Ahem) The town was laid out.

Additional Answers

  • Oh, Doctor Bob. ‘The town was laid out’.
  • The whole town got laid, literally
  • Beaver got laid………ok this is not going well….the town was laid …….nope still not doing well here…..they set the design out for a planned town, quite early in town planning I am thinking and nothing remotely naughty at all
  • Beaver was laid
  • He had diarrhea.
  • I suppose you will get lots of “leave it to Beaver” responses or even references to the fact that the first maps of Tasmania were produced in Beaver, so I should sit this one out. But Wiki says that Beaver was, er, laid out in 1792 with a growth spurt a whole century later. Is that a record, Dr Bob?
  • Lots and lots of things happened, the sun came up and went down. Grass grew, etc etc etc. If you want to be a little more specific the good folk of thereabouts decided to found a little town, and though a street layout would be a really neat thing to have. So while some of the people may have been laid low the town was laid out.
  • Nothing, absolutely nothing. No one was born, no one died, no one aged. The whole town was abducted by aliens on December 31, 1791. And worse, no one else noticed. Returned on January 1st, 1955
  • Four fifths of five eights of bugger all. Probably something to do with toilets being inside. Maybe they planned for public toilets when laying out the town.
  • Obviously a beaver dam burst and took out the town. Which begs the question of what event lead to the naming of Intercourse, Pennsylvania?
  • The Beaver died. Well it was laid out so I assume it was dead.
  • The city was founded in 1792, on a beavers’ beaver, hence the name
  • The town council ratified the charter. Article I: Anyone using innuendo within the city limits to receive the rod to the backside and to be made to ride an ass out of town. By the rear gate.

Question 3

What was the first American TV program to show any part of a toilet on the screen?

Answer

Leave it to Beaver. An episode involving a crocodile kept in the cistern.

Additional Answers

  • “Texas Hold’em Poker Stars”. It daringly broadcast a button marked “Flush”.
  • If you think about it, we are all capable of sitting through a ½ hour or 1 hour TV show without succumbing to the call of nature (or whatever euphemism you want to use). So, so to should the characters in the show. Therefore they don’t need toilets, and it is just a waste of TV time to show them. However, in a display of reckless abrogation of common decency, and in light of the previous question it was left to Beaver to permanently lower the moral tone of television. After that anything could be shown on TV, take (please take) just about any soap opera as an example (warning will permanently effect your IQ and may cause damage to your self esteem).
  • It was the Superbowl in 1965, in that controversial Washroom Malfunction event.
  • Leave it To Beaver. It was an antique toilet from Beaver, Pennsylvania that dropped into the Cleaver back yard from an alien spaceship, along with several dozen confused Beaverians on January 1st, 1955
  • Little room on the Prairie
  • ok sensing a theme….”leave it to Beaver”, damn alligators in the toilet tank
  • The Joy of Painting. Starring a talking toilet brush.
  • House, W.C.

Question 4

Where (apart from in a zoo, etc) could you find penguins, north of the equator?

Answer

Galapagos islands

Additional Answers

  • What? Beavers again? Just leave it.
  • _You_ wouldn’t, but Batman might, eventually—if he hasn’t been dehydrated and scooped into a bottle. Wah wah wah wah wah.
  • Any W.H. Smith bookshop, or if you mean the little feathery critters, then probably the Galapagos Islands
  • Chinese herbalist or John Major’s pants. He liked to keep some there just in case the cold war flared up again.
  • Galapagos Islands have penguins, but more importantly is there Beaver?
  • Galapagos, the Titanic and Iceland
  • Gotham City, monstering the good citizens, and attempting to put Bruce Wayne back in his roost. Other Penguins can be seen north of the Galapagos taking advantage of those delightful cold water currents, but they aint any where near as fun at parties as Batman’s nemesis.
  • In bookshops, usually paperbacks. In guitar shops.(there’s a model of a Gretsch guitar called the White Penguin)
  • Must …Avoid…Telling…Same..Joke..as…last…time. Those islands that Darwin made famous. Isn’t Darwin on Bewitched? Oh well. At least I didn’t tell the joke about the ice cream and the seal. They don’t have Beavers on the Galapagos you know.
  • The Fernandina islands [Galapagos penguins]
  • The Penguins that live together with the beavers on Galapagos Islands
  • The Vatican. I say no more on the subject on order to avoid eternal damnation.

Question 5

Dr Bob recently holidayed on a ship where he was told it was unlucky and therefore forbidden to whistle, to clink drinking glasses together and to say a particular word. What word?

Answer

T I T A N I C

Additional Answers

  • Drowned the Beaver?
  • Liar. Or Titanic.
  • Iceberg!!!
  • Refund
  • ***** It’s the same as my password so you can’t read it on a computer. I’ll spell it backwards ***** Drat! Ah, that’s it.The at is an own.
  • “Hello-sailor”, with very pronounced lisp, they really do hate stereotyping on naval vessels and it is considered terrible bad luck to be thrown overboard by a mutinous crew. I do like the idea that toasts cannot be made using water as it leads to those being toasted to die of drowning. Hang on lets have a go, “here’s to that Meryl” …mwahahahaha, bugger silly superstition
  • Beaver
  • Can’t tell you, it is bad luck! Darn it man you are trying to sink us all with your loose talk. If I was to sing it in a sea shanty though, it would be something with trotters, curly tail and a propensity to produce bacon (though that is a trick it can only do once). Mmmmmm crackling….Kermit the Frog did show some fancy for one. Sorry, what was that officer?
  • Drowned. Oh, and MacBeth if you’re in the ship’s play.
  • Iceberg
  • Macbeth! You really have to stop travelling with those no-good thespians.
  • Well, in the August quiz answers, you hinted you were somewhere north of Iceland on an island with no soil but lots of seeds. I guessed Surtsey. Let’s assume for some bizarre reason there was a Japanese crew, and that would mean the word you couldn’t say would be ‘saru’. And this is an example of how a lot of Googling and a little guesswork can yield a completely wrong answer, in the truth of which the answerer is completely confident and will defend to humiliation.
  • Iceberg!

Question 6

This is one of Daguerre’s first photos – of a main street in Paris. Apart from the one man standing at lower left, where is everybody else?

Answer

It is such a long exposure that nothing that moves is registered. The lone man is getting his shoes cleaned. (This is still a problem in Paris).

Additional Answers

  • Mostly in various cemeteries, seeing as this photo is over a hundred years old.
  • I see a man and a bootblack in the foreground; so perhaps the others were moving too fast for the exposure.
  • Boring answer: Everyone else was moving too fast to be captured – the exposure time was very long.
  • Boring *and* pedantic answer: Technically, there is a second person in the picture: A shoeshine boy in front of the man.
  • Got tired given that the film exposure was taking so long and left to meet the beavers
  • Indoors – The 1830’s is when internet pornography was first invented and everyone stayed indoors instead. Or the exposure times on early photographs was so long that moving people would not be captured.
  • It’s a Daguerreotype. They were there, but you can’t see them because they were walking around, and the time it took to expose one Daguerreotype was so long, they are invisible. That bloke is only there because his feet have been stapled to the ground.
  • Kicked off the street so that Dag’s long multi-minute exposure would not be full of blurs. The bloke at lower left is not blurred – he was bored rigid (for hours, much to Dag’s relief) because he’s listening to Kevin Rudd attempt to answer an Opposition question in Parliament.
  • Not in the picture
  • Oh they were there all right. We just can’t see them. Because they moved. But that guy who looks like he’s getting his boots polished was the first person ever photographed. His name was *********** which is also one of my passwords.
  • On strike. Or being revolting
  • Running about so fast you can’t see them – most un-parisian of them. Who says one can’t exceed the speed of light? You have a photo to prove it!!
  • They all overexposed themselves and disappeared
  • They were all there, but due to the long exposure times they seemed invisible. A better question is why was that one person there?
  • This photo is where it all started. We are mostly aware that if you wish to survive a grizzly bear attack you are meant to lie perfectly still, and it will get bored and go away. Likewise if you were in Paris in 1838 and did not want to get abducted by aliens and were outdoors you needed to stand very still (or in the case of the others in the photo at the park bench to the right, sit still). Everyone else who should have been in the photo failed to stand still, attracted attention to themselves, and have been borrowed for fiendish experiments on board a large flying saucer parked on the dark side of the moon and will be returned to Paris latter, bearing shocking repressed memories and an nasty accent that made them sound like Maurice Chevalier. It was after this photo was released that governments worldwide realised that there was evidence of what they already knew going on, and that it all needed covering up. So they concocted a tail of how it took too long for the negative to be exposed and only slow-moving, or stationary object would be displayed.
  • Walking. The exposure was probably 10 minutes, and the bloke in the bottom corner is asleep.

Comments

  • The voices in my head may not be real, but they have some great ideas. They just never tell you how to clean up the blood.
  • A study released on Tuesday by the US Food and Drug Administration has determined that the majority of drug and biological product manufacturers are meeting the agency’s requirements for postmarketing studies within a reasonable time period. According to the results, 46% of the 591 requirement reviewed were met, which the agency says … Le sigh!
  • Hello Dr Bob.
  • Hooray – the link worked!
  • If this doesn’t win I warn you I will give up trying!
  • More beaver questions please!
  • See you at TAM, Dr Bob.
  • Why would anyone want to be 6 inches from an enemy tank? In front? I don’t think so. Behind? Hot exhaust anyone. Perhaps it was a water tank. I’m not going to win this month am I Doctor Bob. Terrible answers. Roll on December.
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