Questions for June 2015

Here’s the June set.   Feel free to post witty/sarcastic answers as comments.

  1. It has been estimated that the most expensive book-binding job done in the 20th century was a jewel-encrusted copy of the Rubiayat of Omar Khayyam, which took two years to prepare. A London dealer sold the finished book to a client in the USA, with personal delivery by a trusted courier. What went wrong?
  2. What book was once banned because it contained descriptions of the sex life of whales?
  3. What geographical feature is common to the state of Nebraska, and the city of Tashkent?
  4. Why did Ebenezer MacGeorge, employed as an astronomical observer at the Great Melbourne Telescope from 1870-72, resign from his job?
  5. The explorer Dr David Livingstone spent 30 years in Africa as a missionary. How many conversions to Christianity did he make?
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10 comments

  1. DR BOB’S REAL ANSWERS:

    The most expensive book-binding job – Rubiayat of Omar Khayyam => A personal courier took it to the USA in 1912 – or rather, he didn’t – on a prestigious ocean liner which sort of sank.

    Book banned because it contained descriptions of the sex life of whales? => Moby Dick

    Geographical feature common to Nebraska, and Tashkent => They are triply landlocked – surrounded by other states which themselves are doubly landlocked.

    Why did MacGeorge, astronomical observer at the Great Melbourne Telescope from 1870-72, resign? => So he could spend more time attending seances with his wife.

    How many conversions to Christianity did Dr David Livingstone make? => Only one in 30 years – a tribal chief, who upon conversion found he had lost his ability to make rain, and was also disappointed to be restricted to only one wife. When he returned to having many wives, the rains returned too.

  2. 1. It has been estimated that the most expensive book-binding job done in the 20th century was a jewel-encrusted copy of the Rubiayat of Omar Khayyam, which took two years to prepare. A London dealer sold the finished book to a client in the USA, with personal delivery by a trusted courier. What went wrong?
    He sold it for some “magic” beans.
    Or, no one was home when delivery was attempted, and the book went to the local post office which was closed shortly thereafter.

    2. What book was once banned because it contained descriptions of the sex life of whales?
    I’ll have two guesses here:
    (a) the bible. I’m pretty sure its somewhere up the back around about the bit about Jonah.
    (b) the Japanese scientific work – “Delicious Research – Cetaceous Cookery and other lesser known facts about whales.”

    3. What geographical feature is common to the state of Nebraska, and the city of Tashkent?
    Land? sorry can’t think of anything else.

    4. Why did Ebenezer MacGeorge, employed as an astronomical observer at the Great Melbourne Telescope from 1870-72, resign from his job?
    He was an early riser, and that was kind of incompatible with night time star gazing. As the old saying goes: “Early to rise and early to bed: Healthy, wealthy and mentally dead!”

    5. The explorer Dr David Livingstone spent 30 years in Africa as a missionary. How many conversions to Christianity did he make?
    I’m guessing at least one “conversion” because I really doubt he spent all that time in Africa as a celibate missionary,

  3. 1. The shipping clerk responsible for loading it for its trans-Atlantic voyage incorrectly entered it on the manifest as ‘The Rubber Yacht of Hymie Cohen’. Unfortunately it was booked on the Titanic, with the inevitable result of not only its own loss, but that of several crew members who fruitlessly scoured the vessel looking for a nonexistent but potentially life saving device.

    2. It was a misprinted title, which should have read, ‘The Sex Lives of the Princes of Wales’

    3.A shoreline (post global warming).

    4. He saw the universe and thought he’d found god. He converted to spiritualism and never realised his error which was in reality caused by a flaw in the lens of his telescope.

    5.The good doctor regularly regaled the locals with his personal exposition of the faith which he described as The Missionary Position. There were a small number of conversions, but most of them preferred the ways of their ancestors.

  4. 1.It has been estimated that the most expensive book-binding job done in the 20th century was a jewel-encrusted copy of the Rubiayat of Omar Khayyam, which took two years to prepare. A London dealer sold the finished book to a client in the USA, with personal delivery by a trusted courier. What went wrong?

    If he used the same “overnight” courier I used to collect a hand-made gate from Bunnings last year, he can kiss it goodbye PERMANENTLY.

    2.What book was once banned because it contained descriptions of the sex life of whales?

    This is the sex life of “Captain Wales” that lovable rascal Prince Harry one presumes?

    3.What geographical feature is common to the state of Nebraska, and the city of Tashkent?

    Both are about as appealing as holiday destinations as Wellington, NZ.

    4.Why did Ebenezer MacGeorge, employed as an astronomical observer at the Great Melbourne Telescope from 1870-72, resign from his job?

    Hoots Mon. Ye canna break the laws of physics, laws of physics, laws of physics….!

    5.The explorer Dr David Livingstone spent 30 years in Africa as a missionary. How many conversions to Christianity did he make?

    Before I came to Africa you had the land and we had the religion. Now we’ve got the land and you’ve got the religion. Hee Hee.

  5. I thought that my entry as “confused” was the funniest thing I had ever done. Medication and fermented grapes hey, who would have thought it?

  6. 5. But wasn’t he Christian before he left England? Did he vacillate?

  7. 1. witty/sarcastic
    2. witty/sarcastic
    3. witty/sarcastic
    4. witty/sarcastic
    5. witty/sarcastic

    Don’t get the point of this quiz, seems a bit too easy.

  8. 1) OK, what would a Dr Bob trivia quiz be without Hitler or the Titanic? Nothing. They would be nothing. So this is the obligatory “Titanic” question. Answer: This beauty of bookbinding was sent to New York on the Titanic, and…IT WAS NEVER SEEN AGAIN! No clues why.

    2) I didn’t know it was banned, but Melville’s “Moby Dick” contains oblique references to the sex lives of whales. Quick Googly-goo…yup, it was banned somewhere because of that. Not too surprising really.

    3) Geographical Center of Ignorance in each country?

    4) She must have been GIB! He was lured away by a spiritualist, who convinced him somehow that there was more to the stars than the vast leaps of space and billions of amazing structures and worlds to explore. His excuse was he had no time to devote to the task. More likely he was plain pissed and shagged out.

    5) About 0.632178 conversions, approximately. There was one African who said he was a convert, but he retained many of his definitely non-Christian African customs such as rain-making and polygamy. So not a great outcome, conversion-wise, but a good story line.

    Dr B, I’ve been meaning to send in entries the last few months but we have been away in the USA on hols! I was very fortunate and did not get shot even once, nor killed looking the wrong way crossing the road. I was nearly involved in that unfortunate train wreck in Philadelphia but missed it by two days (true story!).

  9. Q1. It has been estimated that the most expensive book-binding job done in the 20th century was a jewel-encrusted copy of the Rubiayat of Omar Khayyam, which took two years to prepare. A London dealer sold the finished book to a client in the USA, with personal delivery by a trusted courier. What went wrong?
    A1. The dealer asked hir secretary to get a strong male courier because the book was very heavy, and the secretary duly emailed the local London courier company asking for a “courier, male” to do the job. The book was never seen again because it wound up in a Brisbane tabloid newspaper office, where the Editor thought it was a pisstake of the Fitzgerald enquiry so he chucked it in the bin (which was then laden).

    Q2. What book was once banned because it contained descriptions of the sex life of whales?
    A2. “Lady Chatterley’s Blubber”.

    Q3. What geographical feature is common to the state of Nebraska, and the city of Tashkent?
    A3. Dunno, Dr Bob, but don’t blame me. It’s San Andreas’ fault.

    Q4. Why did Ebenezer MacGeorge, employed as an astronomical observer at the Great Melbourne Telescope from 1870-72, resign from his job?
    A4. Silly geezer Ebenezer looked at his pay packet one day through the telescope – but the wrong way around. His pay looked so tiny that it offended his Scottish heritage and he resigned forthwith in a froth of righteous indignation.

    Q5. The explorer Dr David Livingstone spent 30 years in Africa as a missionary. How many conversions to Christianity did he make?
    A5. None, I presume.

  10. Q1. On route the courier, a spiritual chap, stopped under a bough to read some verses .With too few loaves and too many jugs of wine he became so rubiyated that the local pickpocket, Fingers, moved in, then moved on.

    Q2. Muhammad and the Joy of Blubber.

    Q2 (Alternate) Moby’s Dick and the Ambitious Sodomite.

    Q3. Rivers, mountains, plains, tectonic plates, glacial scars, and their distance to Proxima Centauri (rounded).

    Q4. Being short-sighted and scientifically ignorant, he thought the ad was for an Astrologer. On reflection, his mercurial temperment and decided lack of depth of vision required to peruse such a stellar position occluded him. He ran off with Venus, the love of his life, but she insisted on a Plutonic relationship. I will stop now.

    Q5. The good Doctor Livingstone founded the African Christianity XV Rugby Union Football Club in 1866. Although he personally had many tries to his name, he never managed any conversions. The once popular phrase to indicate half-arsed attempts “And pointless to boot” fell out of favour on his death.

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